Light At The End Of The Tunnel

For maladies of the mind

Often neglected by their own kind

Brought from places near and far

With dearth of medical facilities on par. 

Old wrinkled men and women, once brimming with abundant energy

Now hobbling around tenderly

And plagued by dwindling memory. 

Little ones from the far east and beyond

Mothers telling me that their child does not respond,

Parents traveling for days and standing in lengthy lines

Just to hear if their child can make it out of the closeted confines. 

To the people who trust and hope in medicine

To the ones who work with passion and discipline

To understand the brain and its intricacy

Is perhaps solving mankind's greatest mystery.

One month at the Central Institute that once meant so much to me and perhaps always will hold a place in my heart. ❤

All of my heart.

 The smile that melts my heart,

I always knew you were a class apart,

Every moment with you is magical,

Conversations are honest and natural.

With your grace you never fail to mesmerize,

With your melodious voice, you always entice. 

To be loved by you is truly my pleasure

Indeed I will always love you beyond measure.

Through happiness and grief you are with me,

Together, a brighter side we will see.

To be with you is a dream come true,

Forever grateful to the day I met you.

Finding Silver Linings.

 It all began in a playful girl of six,

A disease that put her kidneys in a fix,
An rare entity with no known cure,
At every step in diagnosis, the future was obscure.

The once bubbly child was now quiet and wary;
After all, daily pricks and injections were scary.
She quietly swallowed the innumerable pills,
After all, it's a temporary solution to her ills.

But as days progressed, the kidneys only went from bad to worse,
With poverty being an additional curse,
We hoped they would find luck elsewhere,
But alas, no one else seemed to care about her welfare.

With meagre funds and slim hopes we started out,
In spite of all fears and unknown doubt,
On the unknown journey we embarked,
It is unprecedented, naysayers remarked,
Yet with no other alternative in sight,
We took the plunge into what felt right.

Childhood is meant to be free of worry and pain,
Brightened by sunshine, not dampened by rain,
The road ahead is long and tiring,
But for a little girl and her family, its a chance to keep smiling.

The price of innocence.

At an age where childlike innocence,
Meets the raw realities of adulthood
Fragile minds can spark and incense,
When forces contrive to ruin the brittle brotherhood.

In the glorious era to learn and grow,
To ignite minds with fuel to explore,
Here were deprived folks delivering a counterblow,
Neglecting education and bringing communal angles to the fore.

Could you give back the ignorant bliss,
Of living without judgement or hatred,
That once planted will struggle to be derooted,
Even as we sink deeper into a bigoted abyss!

J

Cold and Warmth.

 December was probably the coldest month of the year, literally and figuratively. The first few days were spent in Bangalore and we came back to Mysore by Amma's birthday. I had night duty but it was still a difficult night to get through.

The first 15 days in NICU breezed through without much issues while the next 15 days was something I was not looking forward to. It was emergency ward, and being just 2 people seemed more stressful so I was dreading it before it even began!

I took a couple of days to settle down and it was as hectic as I had imagined. The worst part was the lengthy "charge" given to the night duty PGs and going home quite late. Of course, the fact that we were crossing 14 hours did not count. But I think it wasn't the long hours that bothered me. I personally felt and was made to feel that I was doing a mediocre job and that left me only frustrated after the long hours.
What was particularly difficult was waking up in the morning and getting myself to work. Probably in all these 1.5years I have never had such a bad feeling while going to work. In fact, I would always look forward to going to work, no matter what. But this time, it was different.
Riding through the road parallel to the Railway track indoubtedly left me in a state of turmoil just as my day would begin. The several "rounds" during the day would only add to the pressure of having work incomplete.

But as the days progressed, I began to see things in a better perspective, I realized that the emergency ward is the best place to learn the acute management of any condition and also how it progresses. Apart from the regular bronchopneumonia and dengue cases, there were cases of Guilliane Barre Syndrome, a suspected case of Diptheria for which we administered antitoxin, a case of Kawasaki disease, a nephrotic who turned out to be CBNAAT positive for Tuberculosis, Infantile dengue, a case of Infective Endocarditis with Fallot Physiology, a 2 year old with newly diagnosed juvenile diabetes mellitus and even a case of Central Discordant Precocious Puberty in a one 1 year old secondary to a hypothalamic hamartoma.

I realized I might have done a poor job on some days, I did not write good case sheets and I made several mistakes in my course of 15 days. But I tried to pick myself up after every error and move on.

I also realized it's about time I start to read. I'll have to find time in between my schedule and read now.

In another note, despite all the cold and hostile month that December was, the Sunshine was the saving grace and never failed to bring a smile, even at the end of the hardest days.

Probably the best part of my duty hours was the time spent with little ones who never failed to bring a smile to my face. No matter how bad the day is, seeing a smile emerge on a once sick child is probably the best things about my branch.


Taking one day at a time, one step at a time and trying to make sense of this life even if it seems nonsensical on some days. 

J

Little Miracles.

 Little wonders with the brightest smiles,

Simple mind with the biggest heart,
With stars in their curious eyes,
Kids are perhaps God's greatest art.

Counting every day as a precious surprise,
With dreams of flying high in the skies,
With smiles that bring hope amidst despair
Children have only pure love to share.

To watch their cries turn to hesitant smiles
To see them emerge from pain and sickness
To better days where they overpower their illness,
Is perhaps the greatest miracle to witness. 

In and Out.

 The little girl just did as she was told,

But now her life was fading away and her hands were cold.

Her mother watched from above as the little one lay paralyzed

Even as the poison seeped through her veins undisguised. 

A life ebbing away too soon,

A father too deep in pain to see her as a precious boon,

Alcohol blinded his vision through day and night

Until he could no longer tell wrong from right. 

He fed the hungry mouth the deathly concoction,

Even as she looked at him with love and devotion,

Somewhere they would meet again he decided,

No reason or logic could explain how he was so misguided. 

In hordes they came after the tragedy,

Wailing in despair as she lay delirous,

Where were they when the chips where down?

Where were they when they knew he had a breakdown? 

Her father lost to the world,

Her mother, her guardian angel watching from above,

She lay in limbo between life and death

A pure, innocent soul battled for every breath.

A small girl was brought to the casualty in critical state. Her mother had passed away about 10 months ago. The father had given a poisonous pesticide to the child and had succumbed to the same.

Jayashree Rao 

Shades of Green and Blue.

 

Drive To Survive.

 You arrived a little too soon,

Perhaps weighing a tad too less
But you've been a fighter since your first breath,
Crossing every hurdle and defying death.

Little one, you've seen too much too soon,
But your existence has been a miraculous boon,
It'll only make you stronger and braver
Perhaps the road ahead is smoother and in your favor.

Everyday we see things beyond our grasp,
Sometimes Fate decides to take people in its mortal clasp,
Seeing these little miracles battle against sepsis shock and more,
Makes one take heart and hope there are better days in store.

Baby of Ranjitha, day 22 of life, Preterm with Respiratory Distress Syndrome, battled Septicaemia and Septic shock, Apnoea of Prematurity, NNH and much more..

Each day is a fight for survival and this champ is trying to do it against all odds.

To the spirit of life!

Colours on my palette.