Decoded.

Like the sea that sparkles the sunlight,
Like the stars that twinkle in the moonlight,
You were so perfect and complete.
Until I got to know you, how I wish I didn't!

The sea has its storms and terrifying gales,
They're better seen from a distance.
How I wish I knew then what I know now,
That you were best kept at a distance.

I know everything about you,
Everything that was once a sweet little mystery.
You were a puzzle waiting to be uncoded,
Until I figured you out, how I wish I hadn't!

Like the road who's destiny was unknown
I travelled in your path looking and seeking,
I hoped for an endless journey with meaning,
But I reached the end far sooner than that.

Like the crossword that I've cracked,
Like the last week's newspaper,
Like the riddle that I've solved,
I know everything about you and how I wish I didn't!

Anaesthetized.

Sunny skies and breezy clouds may pass by

Moonlit starry nights may come and go

No longer do they mean the things they used to;

Numbness is all I can sense.

People move in and out of life;

Yet little does it matter anymore.
Because it's all an ephemeral mirage

And the lonely desert haunts no more.

Memories are all that remain in me,

Some embellished and fabricated, some hazy and unclear

And yet, I cling on to them not with hope;

But because they are all I have.

Perhaps imagination has given wings

To dreams that shall die unfulfilled

Perhaps they are all I shall ever have.

Or maybe they may arise and fly high and true

Like the phoenix from the midst of ashes.

But until that glorious moment arrives;

Under the scorching heat, remain resilient.

HyperBacterBrainia

Virchow travels from Heidelberg through Seftenberg and lands at the Newport in Indiana to learn Anatum from Haldar for his Agona who has Enteritidis.

And that's how you remember the other causative agents of Salmonella GI apart from the main one; S. Typhimurium.

That's what happens Abhi and I study something together.

Bacteria are swimming in my Brain. Bacteria have monopolized my day and night. All I can think of is Gram staining, Lactose Fermenting, IMViC, SoCaSoDi (Sodium Chloride, Calcium Chloride, Sodium Thioglycollate and Disodium Phosphate) in Cary Blair medium, EMJH media for Weil's Disease, CAMP test, a zillion antigens, serotypes and serovars, inoculation in Guinea pigs and mice and piglets, maculovesicular lesions, papulovesicular lesions, annular lesions, Schik test, Dick test, skin blueing test, Frei's test, fried egg appearance, drumstick appearance, club shaped appearance, spindle shaped appearance, lanceolate appearance, carrom coin appearance, swarming fish appearance, swimming pool conjunctivitis, neonatal ophthalmia, neonatal meningitis, meningococcemia, Reiter Syndrome, Ritter Syndrome, toxic epidermal necrolysis, necrotizing fasciitis, flesh eating bacteria, 28, TSSS and so on......

Aaaah.

Being Numb.

You know there's trouble brewing when you don't feel anything anymore. It's a feeling of neutrality towards everything and you don't feel any intensity in the emotions, be it positive or negative. It's not like this hasn't happened before but it's just emptiness and vacuum that you feel most of the time so it's a little worrying.

The wind tickled her hair, the Sun shone on her face,

The eyes spoke volumes and the smile made hearts race.

His words were far and few but deep and true.

His dreams were hers, together they intended to pursue.

Sun-kissed days and starry nights sailed by,

Blissful indulgence made Time seem to fly.

Their idyllic paradise seemed complete and perfect,

No harm in the world could ever have an effect.

Alas! Fate, they say is a fickle mistress,

Out of the blue came a sudden distress.

She was ravaged and torn by the illness,

Without her charm he was forever listless. 

Her pain he could not take away,

Without her lilt in her voice and sparkle in her eyes

He couldn't keep the demons at bay,

And together they departed for a place beyond the blue skies.

Etched in their hearts were not the days of suffering and sorrow,

But the happiness of the memories they shared,

Their hopes for a better tomorrow

And the contentment of having found someone who cared.

Maybe I'm inherently flawed to find imperfections in everything. Maybe I need to appreciate the fact that people and things can be beautiful without being perfect. I've realized that I tend to distance people for the simple reason that they are getting close. I withdraw into a shell or regret everything that (n)ever happened. I find flaws and teach myself to backtrack because I tend to look for perfection. Maybe such a thing does not exist. We're all flawed and imperfect and maybe I need to come to terms with it. Maybe I tend to expect too much while giving too little. Maybe I live in a castle made of false hopes and imaginations. Maybe it's just exists in Utopia. Maybe my castle will crumble to dust when it is attacked by Reality. Maybe it's just me being myself. -_-

The past days have been eventful to say the least. 

• Last Sunday we watched FF7 (Ironically, the last of the series is the first one I've seen) and after this we all had lunch at Mathura (Adi and Rakesh's treat) so it was nice day. :)
• DeMedCon poster on Tuberculosis of Navicular bone accepted! This means I have a LOT of reading to do.
• Community medicine postings are no longer boring because we need to do seminars and then we get to go on field visits! 

Our first field visit was to an Aanganwadi where we spent a lot of time with the kids. The kids were happy to see us and sang and danced for us with excitement. These children don't have the facilities that their urban counterparts have but their Happiness Index is considerably higher because they are happy in what they have. How different their childhood seemed from our own upbringing, yet how much they seemed to have learnt about life than us.. 

Cutiee Pieeee Darshan <3

Group photo and everything B)

As a twenty year old Bangalorean (living in Shimoga), from all my travels be it to Shimla, Kashmir or around South India, I often feel our perception of our country is of the metros, cities, towns, hillstations, beaches and so on.. Yet, that is far from the truth. The true essence of our country is not in the metros, the malls, the skyscrapers, airports and 7 star hotels but in the hinterlands you see when you stray off the highway and wander through the fields and villages. Cities are just the tip of the iceberg. India's growth is measured by the quality of education these children receive and by the facilities in these villages, not just the more privileged ones studying in swanky international schools and living in luxury villas. What we see outside is just an eyewash. Contrast the air-conditioned chambers, the glassy exteriors and plush driveways of any corporate set up to the panchayats and sub-center of any nearby village. Contrast the city kid who is driven to her English medium school (where speaking in Kannada invites a fine) by her driver while the kids of these villages walk/cycle to their Kannada medium school which is a modest little building be it monsoon or summer. Contrast the opportunities the city kid has (music/ dance/ sports/ abacus classes apart from coaching classes for board exams and competitive exams) to the opportunities of their rural counterparts. True, it's not as bleak as it sounds, but the disparity is evident and only increasing with time since more and more people are migrating to the urban areas in search of better livelihood. Now, this not only creates more pressure on the urban set up to provide for more than its capacity but it also leads to more neglect and indifference towards development of rural areas. If half the rural population were to migrate, then what would happen to agriculture? India is primarily an agricultural country. Indian economy subsists on agriculture and related fields. Thus, the key to development lies in the uplift of rural India. 

Community Medicine shows that there are innumerable programs that work from the grassroots level and cater to the rural areas slowly work their way up. The primary goals are Mother and Child Health (MCH), Primary Education and Nutrition. The aanganwadi system is mainly catering towards the mother and child welfare. Providing elementary pre-primary education and nutritious food are the main goals of this set-up.

Our second field trip was more of an outing since both the sub-centers we visited were closed and we couldn't meet the Health Worker as they'd been out on field visits. Nevertheless, we had a good time (throwing stones to get raw mangoes, borrowing the cycles of the school kids and (trying to) cycle, and walking through green fields and flowing streams. As we grow older, we begin to take delight in the little things. It's the memory of the simplest things that are often most precious to us. 

This looks like some sort of Government advertisement to promote schooling. :')

Clowning around has always come naturally to me, :D

Apart from this, life is progressing as insanely as always. This is how I would describe my current state. Do note that I tend to keep alternating between the two at irregular intervals. 

Toodles, dear friend. :)

The Ultimate Nightmare.

Here's to a day that's taught me many things.
Here's to day that made realize many things.
Here's to the friends who make you feel good about yourself, who fill you with inspiration, motivation and a solid dose of advice that makes you look at things in a different perspective.
Here's to the friends who want you to do well, who will lend a hand and make sure you avoid the pitfalls.
Here's to that rare set of friends who will be there for you no matter how far they are, who will have faith in you and who will believe in you in those times when you doubt yourself.
Here's to the friend who takes the time off and convinces you that you are no less than anybody else.
Here's my thank you to you. (Because I'm pretty sure you won't be seeing this. ;) )
Wish there were more such people!

Lately, it had occurred to me that I am probably not extremely competitive. I would describe myself as moderately competitive. No the cut-throat, obsessed kind. My driving factor has most often been the urge to do well and not the desire to be No.1. Yes, it might seem strange, but what I mean is, I do it out my interest, not out of the desire to beat X/Y/Z and get to the top. But I'd been pondering if this was the right attitude because when I see X/Y/Z, it is this competitive spirit that enables them to get to the top.

But the truth is, this is irrelevant. The goal has nothing to do with X/Y/Z. In medicine, the ultimate nightmare is having a patient in front of you and being unable to diagnose/treat them appropriately. Watching the patient suffer while you fumble and falter with your concepts is the most horrifying idea. It's THIS imagery that should prompt any medico to give their 100% and work towards excellence. Yes, it's important to know where you stand relatively because in today's world, you are judged based on how you're better than the one beside you. But that isn't the sole criterion. The most important factor is to keep the Ultimate Nightmare in mind and study so that you will not fail in alleviating the suffering of the patient.

Res Ipsa Loquitur

"Res Ipsa Loquitur" is Latin for "The thing speaks for itself". With respect to Forensic Medicine it means that the nature of the injury itself suggests the negligence of the defendant and thus requires no further proof. Sometimes, somethings require no further proof, validation or explanation because it speaks for itself. 

Our life is not measured by the highs and lows but by our adaptations to change. Change is inevitable and one can never predict what changes each day will bring. We are defined by our ability to cope with the Wild card that Life throws at us. 

Our post-dinner ward visits have resumed and every day we look at a few new cases and try to learn something new. (and try to remember what we've seen earlier) Recently we got the chance to see:

• Abdominal Aortic Aneurysm (thrill could be palpated, atherosclerotic plaques clearly seen in the Scan via the dye injected)
• Follicular variant of Papillary Carcinoma of Thyroid gland 
• Capsuloganglionic hematoma of the right side (this was clearly seen in the CT Scan) leading to hemiparesis and decreased visual field of the left side.
• Carcinoma of Breast (BIRADS Type 4)

Last weekend I'd been home after about 2 months (for a very short duration: 50hours) and it felt good to spend time with family. I also got time to catch up with Mani after a long time and listening to the medical stories at BGSGIMS, I felt slightly relieved. Maybe it's the pressures of the profession that drives people to be the way they are. But after exchanging stories of our respective colleges, it felt as though we're both in the same ocean, heading in the same direction, just in different boats. 

On Tuesday (24th March), we got to see our first surgery in the OT (ENT). 

The Patient presented with 

• extensive deafness
• discharge (mucoid to mucopurulent, without blood) from ear (exacerbated by head bath, relieved on medication)
• post nasal drip 
• facial nerve dehiscence

Previous history of CSOM (Chronic Suppurative Otitis Media) in left ear. Granulation tissue is present. 

It began as an exploratory procedure as Cortical Mastoidectomy and then they opted for Modified Radical Mastoidectomy because they had to delve even more extensively to locate the cause of dehiscence. After finding a cotton piece at the centre of the granulation tissue, Dr Harish performed Type 3 tympanoplasty (by making changes to the incus and re-attaching it and this was followed by autograft of Temporal fascia of the patient) and meatoplasty (to widen the canal). After this, he completed the procedure with inverse suture using catgut.

To read more about this procedure: http://med.stanford.edu/ohns/earinstitute/otology-neurotology/resources/chronic_otitis_media_cholesteatoma.html

Procedures:

• Modified Radical Mastoidectomy
• Meatoplasty
• Type 3 Tympanoplasty

Cotton piece found, granulation tissue around this cotton piece which was causing compression near geniculate ganglion.

Pre Anaesthetic Medication: Xylocaine Adrenaline infusion

Post Operative Medication: MonoCef (antimicrobial-Ceftriaxone), Periset (Antiemetic-Ondansetron) and Dynapar (NSAID)

Distribution of Facial Nerve. Compression of the nerve can lead to altered facial
expression since the nerve supplies the muscles of face.

So this was our first OT and we were super excited. It was indeed a deja vu moment that reminded me of Grey's Anatomy when Harish Sir scrubbed up and elbowed his way into the Operation Theatre. 

All Scrubbed Up.

So it was indeed a test of endurance since the procedure lasted for a good 4 hours. Here's hoping that we get to see many more surgeries! We (Abhi and I) saw the patient in the MICU during our night visit (where we happened to meet Harish Sir again) and her smile was normalized now as was her ability to close and open her eyes.

Us! :P

Pharmacology and MicroB tests are coming up in the month of April as is the much awaited Medical Conference DEMEDCON at SDUMC, Kolar. ENT Postings are coming to an end and we will then begin Community Medicine. Hopefully we will have a few field visits and rather than merely giving attendance and walking out.

Songs update:

• Heroes: Alesso Ft Tove Lo
• Tere Bin Nahin Lage Jiya
• Love Me Like You Do: Ellie Goulding 
• Meeti Boliyan
• Yeno Yeno Agide (All the songs are awesome actually)

Seeya :)

Tripping scenes. :D

Hello there!

So 8th March 2015 was our class trip to Manipal, Udupi, St Mary’s Island and Maple Beach (after much debating, planning and procrastination)!

On Saturday, we went out to the city after what seemed like forever and when we came back, the college was a riot of colours! Yes, half the students from both the hostels were out on the roads enjoying Holi. It was virtually impossible to recognize anybody given that everybody was caked in different shades and drenched in water (possibly sourced from the lake beside our college) and we faced the imminent threat of also being smeared with colours so we decamped to the mess and then watched the proceedings from a vantage point.

Post dinner, the excitement was in the air and the localites had arrived to stay overnight since we would be leaving early in the morning. At midnight, there was a bonfire organized at the girls’ hostel (but I happened to walk in when the embers were dying down) as a run-up to all the excitement that awaited us.

We left the campus gates by 4am by chanting praises of Mr Y (BP’s idea) and for a substantial part of the journey, we sang songs and had an Antakshari of sorts. This was our first such trip and for many people, it was the first such journey with friends.

At the crack of dawn we got out for a short break and soak in the wilderness of the Ghat section but we were shooed inside after being threatened that tigers roamed this region.  (-_-) We halted at Manipal for breakfast and then proceeded towards the Museum of Anatomy and Pathology which has a wide variety of specimens that makes for a great viewing. Post this, we chilled for a while at their food court (Govi’s treat. For? Errr. First year mbbs result :P)and then we set of towards the harbour. Prior to this there was another stop where most of the people had lunch (i.e savoured some sea food) whereas Abhi, BP and I clowned around on a random street. (That includes waving at random passers-by, striking the Titanic pose at the middle of the road and so on.. Don’t bother judging me, I do it myself all the time anyway!) We took the ferry ride to St Mary’s Island which was pleasant given that it wasn’t sunny at all.

Abhi and I at Manipal :)

On the island we (Kundur and I) went on the jet ski which was not scary as it was touted to be. After this, we were on a Spree! A photo-clicking spree at every possible place, in every possible angle, with and w/o shades, with and w/o the hats and so on! Just like DJ night, Kundu and I were the perfect team for the Island leg of the trip! Nevertheless, we had a good time and enjoyed the serenity of the place.

Some Cliche' Photoshoot :P

After this, we went to Malpe Beach were a considerable amount of time was spent in pondering whether or not we should get into the water, whether or not we should go for some of the rides and walking around (with difficulty) on the sand. But soon, we were walking on the beach, enjoying the waves, the setting sun and the cool breeze that provided a respite from the glaring heat during the day.

Kundur and I

We halted again at Manipal for Dinner and most people chose from the three options: KFC, Pizza Hut and Dominoes. It was time for another treat (from AVM, for clearing the 1st mbbs exams) and it was rather fun. (Despite the fact that I had almost shut down after all the excitement)

The journey back to college was mostly uneventful except when the driver put on some blaring music (that is still ringing in my ears like persistent tinnitus) and switched on the lights to ward off sleep. But soon, that too came to an end and we found ourselves at the gates of SIMS at 3:30am. It was all over. Our much awaited class trip had come to an end!

The hardest part was getting up at 7am the next day and attending the theory classes at 8am and ENT postings for another 3 hours.

Initially I was reluctant and had assumed the worst possible outcome of the trip but as Icabo, Makshi and Gimpi had predicted, everything turned out just fine. True, half the people were with their “better half” and everybody moved in close knit gangs but it didn’t matter anyway (I had feared that it would). You need to go with the flow and not cling on to your comfort zone. That’s how you’ll find happiness irrespective of who you’re with.

Of What Is Dead And Buried.

Apologies. (in case you were waiting)

• February, the month of sports, cultural events and college day has passed. It's back to the routine of classes, postings and practicals for a while now. Except that the class trip is coming up over this weekend. :D

Saana Kundu and Mee. :)

• Restarted jogging (or rather, brisk walking) for the simple reason that it helps me remain active and for the rest of the day, not to mention that I need to remain fit.

• Bibliophile Updates:
• Chasing Tomorrow by Tilly Bagshawe (thanks to Anu! :D )
• Best Kept Secret by Jeffrey Archer (thanks to Likki! :D )
• Be Careful What You Wish For by Jeffrey Archer

• We're currently in our ENT postings. By the end of these postings we would have seen several endoscopies and Indirect Laryngoscopies (fingers crossed for chance to see a Tympanoplasty in the OT. After 3 days of maám, Ballal Sir taught us today! (rather he extracted answers out of us and tested our Anatomy by going into the specifics. The thing is, we tend to mumble the answers (right or wrong) to ourselves and the teachers either lose interest in us or demand to know what is it that we're whispering to ourselves. Although it was a HIGHLY embarrassing session where we realized how much we've forgotten, it was interactive and fun as well. :)

• We finished our OBG Postings which was majorly a theoretical session where we learnt about Pre Ecclampsia, Gestational DM, Ante-Partum and Post partum Hemorrhage, Labor, Cesarean Section and several other topics. What rankled us is the fact that the next batch is getting to watch procedures in the OT while we never did. :(

• Professors respond based on the kind of interaction they receive from the students. An interactive session encourages the teacher and they share more information because they know the students are receptive. This is a probable explanation why each batch is treated differently in the postings.

• Communal violence in Shimoga town prompted the authorities to declare holidays and impose curfew and Section 144 in the surroundings. Normalcy has returned and the Section will be lifted post Holi.

• Pathology has started to worry me because I realize that my brain does not want to accept, process or retain anything related to Leukemia. Being insulted by Mr.Y has become a regular affair and you develop some tolerance to it but the worrying fact is that there is actually truth in what he says. Sarcasm from Mr.V is nothing new but the fact that he is actually being honest is rather depressing. What kind of clinicians will we become? What kind of diagnosis will we do? What sort of Examination will we do on our patients? What kind of studying is this if it doesn't help you treat your patient?

• I don't know if it's a good thing that I keep reverting to the past and tend to look at it as a guiding light to what lies ahead. In some ways, I miss the excitement of first year, the rush to go take our place in the dissection hall (lest some other hyper excited idiot starts off dissecting by getting their hands on the dissection box), the little preparation we did before dissection (because RK wouldn't spare us if we failed to answer or atleast made a decent attempt) and our involvement in the whole process. Have things changed? Has the excitement dwindled? Or does it depend on whether the lecturer is engaging enough?
• Patching up has its advantages. You feel lighter and a load seems to have lifted off your chest. You no longer carry the burden of misunderstandings that continues to grow rapidly with time like a malignant tumor. Sometimes, you've got to leave your ego behind you and make the first move. Everything else will sort itself out. :)

• Too many things have been going on lately. Too much confusion and way too much nonsense. And that brings me to the point I'd like to stress upon in this post: Me-time. The idea of personal time seems to have completely vanished. The idea of having time for oneself has become extinct and everything is either a joint effort or a collaboration and I'm beginning to realize how much I've become dependent on this collaboration. Now, I've always been comfortable with the idea of being "solo", more than that, I've actually enjoyed the clarity of thought and peace that it gives, even if the rest of the world interprets it as anti-social.
• Certain decisions ought to be taken in the near future. Neither is the perfect solution but one must decide which is more viable and which is the closest solution to what I need.
• Of late, I've been gripped by a persistent dilemma. About the future. Have I really chosen the right thing? Is this career suited for me? Will I be able to do justice to it? I seem to have elapsed into a vortex of passivity and rarely do I emerge and interact productively. Added to this is the misery of having forgotten Anat, Physio and Biochem which the professors take joy in pointing out with great scorn and sarcasm. This makes me question myself, are my methods wrong? Is my approach wrong? Do I need to revise more often? Or am I not cut out for this? This is the profession I have chosen for myself. Will I be successful with the same rate of effort? My weakness is that I evade, avoid and detest explaining any concept. I'm slowly beginning to realize how important it is to be able to describe a process, a condition or a mechanism with simplicity. This quality is one of the foremost prerequisites of a medico, not just the ability to fill endless pages of information. Painful as it seems, the distinction that I worked for means nothing. Every other day, I question myself as to how I've passed first year of MBBS. Have I cheated myself more than anybody else by passing?
• Very often, one is tempted to join the herd. When even those closest to you, it doesn't seem so bad after all. But then, it's at these moments that you should stick to your principles and do what is right.

• I am strongly tempted to Delete (Not Just Deactivate or Uninstall) WhatsApp, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat and Hike (yes, even silly Hike) but such temptations have become a regular thing. Rarely do I "succumb" to them.

• Plans to meet MaPaDi have once again been postponed. It might be another month before we meet. Bheemi has exams coming up, I have ENT, She'll have her results and then hopefully I can meet them all. Nidhz is busy with boards (for an entire month. Phew!) so it will be a while before I meet them as well. It's been I while since I spoke to Ajji-Bajji, I should probably call her today.

• Check out the Prognosis App on Google Play Store. An interesting app where you've got to diagnose a case based on the given input, investigate with relevance and treat accordingly. You score based on your performance and you get a detailed explanation regarding the diagnosis and course of treatment and why the other options are less appropriate in the case concerned. 

• OH AND BY THE WAY, I've completely forgotten to mention about my May Plans!! This may be a little hard to believe (you might even be tempted to Roll On The Floor and Laugh but it's true). I intend to travel by myself to Mumbai and meet Bhopieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee for a few days. (I can do cool stuff in life too)
• I'm currently writing another story. Let's hope I persevere and finish it. :D
• Musicophilia:
• It's Empty (The Click Five) [Song courtesy: Annlee! :D]
• Yun Hi Chala (Swadesh)
• Jeena Jeena (Atif <3)

• Quote Factory:
• "Anyone can be a good winner. The sign of a great man is how you handle defeat." -Jeffrey Archer (Best Kept Secret)
• "Sneham Mathram Puchikaruthu (Malayalam) - Never Belittle Love."-Preethi Shenoy (Life Is What You Make It)
• “You’re so bossy.” “Why is a woman always described as bossy, when if a man did the same thing he’d be thought of as decisive, commanding and displaying qualities of leadership?” -Jeffrey Archer (Be Careful What You Wish For)

                                        

Seeya Later Folks! (Sedative Hypnotics awaits! BTW Did you know that Sedatives technically are not for insomnia but for producing a calming effect and decreasing irritability? Hypnotics are the ones used in those cases to induce sleep. Sounds confusing? Read this.

Awwwww.

Blogspired.

A long time ago, young girl was mesmerized by a blog.

A blog of a genius, whose ramblings still make me smile and gain inspiration every time I read it. I still remember the day, it was the day before our English Language exam but I didn't regret the time I spent for one moment. For the next 2 years or so, that blog remained an inspiration to work hard, to push myself further and to dare to dream big. The experiences, the effort behind every success, the strong urge to keep improving oneself and so many more features of the blog made it a sort of Bible for me. I faithfully read and re-read every line and like plant feeding on nutrients and sunlight for existence, the blog fed my soul at a time when life seemed to be going astray. True, I didn't get to do what I initially intended to do, but it doesn't mean that I've given up. My coffee addiction partly stems from the blog wherein the author indulged on copious amounts of caffeine in order to make the most of time which will never come back to us.

To this day, the dream remains, the fire is still burning and the desire to reach that dream destination is stronger than ever. It is this dream which pushes me every time I begin to falter or decrease my tempo, it is this dream that helps me shut out all the unwanted bullshit and narrow down my priorities.

And today I read something similar, but something I could relate with to a greater extent. A genius, no doubt (BMC and JIPMER) with a genuine love and passion for medicine which is reflected in the enthusiasm in the posts about the cases. The single minded devotion, the long journey of a medical student from the final years of UG through PG and to the present have been encapsulated to make an interesting read. As a fellow blogger, it indeed means a lot to see the journey of a doctor through the years..

Reading this blog also reminded me that It's about time I pull up my socks and get back on track to the things that matter. It's important to keep revising old knowledge in order to cement their existence in your brain and at the same time keep acquiring new knowledge everyday to widen your database.

Adios Amigo. :)

Nocturnal Notes.

Back again rather early, am I? Pardon me but I wish to rant and rant I shall because what greater purpose does my blog serve?

Preparations for College Day is progressing well and the excitement is in the air despite a number of students trickling out of the campus owing to the extended weekend. Lighting arrangements are being made and one is reminded of our enthusiasm last year at seeing the decked up college lit up in the darkness. 

Sometimes you let go of your ego and try to build bridges but in the bargain you end up burning another set of bridges. Ultimately the key rests within us, the key to our happiness. We choose what we get affected by. You could say a zillion things and they can bounce away without leaving the tiniest dent. Or the smallest of carefully phrased remarks could leave a scar whose pain sears deep within. It's all in the mind. (Invictus ;) )

Nevertheless, it is important to remember that there will always be naysayers, critics and negativity. Look at the better aspects, accept them, improvise and eliminate the bullshit. Like I've said on earlier occasions, nobody can rob you of your happiness. It doesn't mean you surround yourself with sycophants, it means that you let your conscience decide. At such junctures, it is essential to remember that there are bigger and better things to deal with and it is better to focus the limited neuronal capacity that we've been allotted with on such aspects.

I realized that I've actually grown as an individual and it doesn't bother about what people assume about me. Of course, I haven't developed complete immunity but I guess I've got a strong vaccine against it for now. I can laugh it off because I've realized that it is virtually impossible to convince anybody of anything so I might as well stop trying and just continue with my work. You will begin to feel less hurt when you tie your happiness to goals rather than to people.

In the past 12 hours, I've watched a marathon session of movies that are each beyond comparison.

• The Imitation Game
• A Beautiful Mind (A tearful watch. A definite must-watch.)
• Lincoln (2012) [in parts]

Currently reading:

• The Writerly Life by RK Narayan

It's about time I restart reading the following books:

• Robbins
• KDT
• Ananthnarayan
• KSN

Ah, the bliss of the nocturnal rambler.

Bonded by a common goal, they were entwined as a single soul