Experiments.

Deepu, BP, Abhi and Me. :)

Blogging with 10% charge remaining. Hence, this is going to be one hurried post.

Back in college, back to the routine (of Lounging in the Library) and back to everything. Well almost, because there certainly have been a few changes. 

For starters, I got a new haircut. (Inspired by our Surgery lecturer's amazing haircut). It was actually an impromptu decision carried out in solo and met with some skepticism from Ma (understandable, considering how Long Hair is the prerequisite for any woman according to her) but then, Hair will grow back, but Time cannot be reversed. Hence, such experiments should be conducted at the right age. :P

New roommates are another shift from last year. Hoping for good times ahead with Nammu ma'am and Ehra. Apart from this, I'm currently battling a disease. The primary symptom is that I remember random events from my life and a weirdly inappropriate smile appears at all the wrong times. This disease has no known cure, except of course to have a better control of where you let your thoughts wander during any soporific class.

Currently addicted to Tum Hi Ho and Kabhi Jo Badal Barse (the remixed versions) by the singer Arjun. 

College has been going on as usual. My affinity towards my phone has reached alarmingly high levels. (I should probably stop taking my phone to college, I've blossomed into a big Snapchat addict, a regular Hiker and an intensive Instagrammer. (All to make up for the time spent on WhatsApp -_-)

In this week, we got to see our first patient. A 27 year old woman with a recurrent swelling in the breast. We took her case history and examined the swelling. We met her again after the surgery and wished her all the best. For our first case, we were pretty excited and a major part of the process is about effective communication to elicit information from the patient. You'll need to take the patient into your confidence, listen to their complaints, their story, even if it doesn't directly pertain to the case and assure them that eventually they will get better (even if you aren't sure of it yourself). The toughest moment came today in the afternoon when we met her after the surgery. She broke down into tears and expressed her worries whether the swelling would recur again. We consoled her and assured her that she would be fine. This is our very first case, years later I might look back and feel sheepish/foolish/lame/stupid at my observations.. But then, the patient is not just another "case", they are individuals with a family, a story and are vulnerable. They require support and comfort too, apart from the medical care provided. 

Today happened to be quite an eventful day. Clinical postings in the morning were suspended and we assembled in the Lecture Hall. The route to the lecture hall was studded by security guards posted at regular intervals interspersed by clumps of nurses at the main entrances to greet the VIPs of the function. The event was to mark World Mental Health Day (Oct 10th) and was presided by the DC of Shimoga (V P Ikkeri) and the main man behind the event was Dr. Ashok Pai, a prominent psychiatrist, native to Shimoga and known for improving psychiatric facilities throughout Karnataka. Several other emiment persons also attended the event,

As I've heard on innumerable occasions, they spoke about the need to spread awareness about the importance of mental health, eradication of the stigma associated with it, improved mental health facilities in all districts and the lack of qualified doctors and psychologists to treat the increasing number of psychiatric patients. (The statistics are quite grim, one in four persons is susceptible to any mental health disease, one in every family may have a person suffering from a mental health disease..) 

Apart from this, we also witnessed a show from students of a school for Mentally Challenged children. The children performed exceptionally well and left many of us teary eyed at their enthusiasm, exuberance and their excitement. Somewhere, I was confused whether one must feel "sad" for them. True, we encouraged them, cheered them to perform better and applauded them for coming on stage and perfoming in front of a crowd, but is there the need to "pity"? Maybe not. Maybe. It's probably a very sensitive topic and I'm not very convinced I have a solid argument for either case, so I'll let it rest. But one thing can be said for sure, it certainly made the children happy to come on stage, as it made us, :)

Adios, dear readers (if any). It's about time I wind up and write Forensic Records for Vindhya (In return for Chocolates, what else? [Wait, am I turning into a greedy pig?!?!])

Give It Any Name, fo chrissake!

Tired, Aching and Sleepy. Yet feel the urge to blog because who knows when I'm going to do so again.

One more vacation has passed and it's time to head back to where I belong. Diwali was a noiseless affair and the only things we lit were a few diyas, a handful of sparklers and flower pots. Balipaddimi at Vnagar is another tradition that's been followed for the longest time, but never have we had such a quiet Diwali. But it isn't about that is it? It's a time to get together (and click pigs. xD)

Songs playing in my mind:

• Piya Re Piya Re (by Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan)
• Piya O Re Piya (Atif)
• Lehrein (because it's apparently the worst caller tune possible. -_- And I have it. B) )

All Lit Up!

Family Selfie Scenes!

And that's how she spent the three days.

SLR Scenes

And today, I met my homies, my lovelies, my foolies; Bhopie and Shamie (aka Sheepie). Hogged on some breakfast (Food is our numero uno priority in life) and chatted about Life, 'the meaning of "meaning" ' and other extremely sensible topics [the creepiness of rabbits and the importance of finding a soulmate who will be okay with you talking about rabbits for no apparent reason, the pointlessness of snakes and roaches, the horror of having Gopalan ma'am snub you in your dreams (as well), my very exciting social life in Shimoga (which left the two of them gaping in wonderment), the social 'habits' of our friends' circle, the college buzz from PeeShit (Oops, I meant Pesit. :P ), the plans for future and the purpose of the lives we're leading in different cities (by a twist of fate)].  

Happy Scenes

 A dose of Maidha and Sanj can elicit happiness for a long time to come. May they never ever change and continue to spread joy and laughter with those pea-sized brains. I've never spoken so much nonsense (and yet felt so much at peace) in SO Long! :") I'm SO glad this short meetup happened (Maidhs luckily finished her pre-Internal cramming and Sanj surprised us by flying down from Bhopal for the Diwali break. :D)

Spazz Scenes

I shall retire for the night. There's a bus to catch in 8hours, a back that's broken, a brain that's starving for sleep.

Deluded Rambles.

Blissful sleep is better than Insomnia.
Insomnia is better than having nightmares.
But what if those nightmares were better than reality itself?

It all feels like a Castle built on cards; ready to collapse into irreparable rubble at the slightest nudge. Those within, know the reality and live in the constant fear of being buried alive, while those outside, assume it to be a palace where the residents would live "Happily Ever After".

Fear can sap the life out of the best moments, fear can hinder progress, bring back the memories you hope to forget and leave you in a perpetual state of turmoil. The future can appear promising and hopeful or bleak, uncertain and daunting; it all depends on the vision of the individual and the ability to make that vision a reality.

Some experiences alter our take on life. It leads us to take certain decisions that may be questioned, criticized and scrutinized but know what we are doing is in the best interest. Ultimately, we must live with our choices, nobody can change that. 

Is there no end? No solution? Doesn't it ever get better? I've given up on expecting any answers.

Maybe it's a cliche'  expression, Maybe it's also true. Maybe, i'm the impractical fool who didn't believe it. When the going is good, you are surrounded by people who share the moment with you and make it all the more sweeter. But when the storm hits, you realize you've got to fight your battles alone and that makes it all the more painful.

College begins on Monday. As they say, From the frying pan into the fire. Do what you believe in, believe in what you do. It's important to be yourself, to stand by your values and lead your life by your principles rather than being perfect in others eyes. "Others" being the fair weather folks who disappear in times of need.

We've done some online shopping via Amazon and Flipkart. Here's hoping it'll be put to good use.

Divya and I have been productive these holidays. :)

Fresh batch of Diyas, waiting to be painted.

Colours to sparkle it up!

The last picture to be taken on the Samsung Galaxy Ace

All lined up to be glittered.

Ta-daaa! :)

What Happens In Shimoga, Stays in Shimoga. :P

There is so much to blog about! This is going to be one LOONG Post! :D

So College began on the 6th of October as scheduled but most people came by Thursday or Friday.We reached Shimo on Monday night after driving through pretty heavy rainfall for most of the way. I attended classes from Tuesday and luckily enough Nammu ma'am and I become roommates. A lot of people got juniors or seniors as roommates due to the space constraint in the hostels.

We're now divided into smaller batches for our postings. The batch that I'm in will have Surgery for one month. The other batches include General Medicine, OBG and Community Medicine. Our HoD is Dr. Lahoti and so far a few lecturers have taught us the basics, that is, History Taking (eliciting information from the patient and presenting it), pain, examination of a lump of swelling, an ulcer and few other concepts. We haven't been allowed to the wards yet (although we're encouraged to do so in the evenings and over the weekends) and it will be quite some time before we see any surgery. Until then, we've got to master the art of History Taking; that is asking the right questions from the patient to come up with a diagnosis.

Our clinical postings are from 9 to 11 everyday. After this we have theory classes for the next two hours (by which time I'll be absolutely famished and ready to eat anything that's served, so mess food is not a problem.) Our second year subjects are Pathology (study of disease), Pharmacology (study of drugs, their actions, mechanisms and excretion), Microbiology (study of (pathological) microorganisms) and Forensic Medicine (use of medical knowledge, physics, chemistry and biology for establishing the cause of deaths, injuries, etc.

The books we're expected to refer to are:

• Pathology: Robbins (Harshmohan for the exams)
• Pharmacology: K D Tripathi
• Microbiology: Ananthanarayan and Panicker 
• Forensic Medicine: KSN Reddy 
• Surgery: S. Das 

Post lunch (when sleep sets in and fighting it becomes a challenge) we have labs as usual for 2 hours. On our first Forensic Lab, I made a fool of myself by nearly fainting. Maybe it was the suffocating feeling because 30 of were huddled together, maybe it was because we were seeing a lot of grotesque images all at once, but for a few zillion seconds, everything seemed to spin and I'm thankful I didn't collapse. But it's also an extremely annoying, disappointing moment that I was too 'weak' to withstand two hours of Forensic Lab. Can't/Shouldn't/Won't happen again. 

Our first Pathology Lab was equally memorable owing to the fact that the HoD appears to be rather eccentric. The 10 minutes that Vaibhav Sir spent with us was much more informative (although his negative approach can be very putting off. "You have to pay for every moment you waste. Maybe you'll pay for it now, maybe you'll pay for it later, but you''ll have to pay for all the time you waste.") 

The good and not so good aspect is that college starts at 9. Good because we get to sleep more and not so good because we get to sleep more (than we need to.) Our college began much later than it was supposed to, (almost 20 days late) but somehow I haven't been able to really get into the groove yet. It's probably the extended vacation where I didn't study, it's probably a slight decline in motivation levels or it's the 10 day Diwali vacation that we're now having or maybe it's "kobbu". Plus I've been freaking out over how I've forgotten nearly everything I studied in first year, which makes me question how and why did I pass and which makes me all the more worried about how I will cope with second year. Nevertheless, I definitely must start working soon. (Time to deactivate FB, perhaps?)

In fact, on the last (but one day) before the holidays, Dr. Gopinath Sir brought a real patient for us to examine. She was extremely cooperative and allowed us to watch her being examined (usually patients are hesitant and require to be convinced) but the anticlimax was that we were pretty much clueless about how to proceed after the basic history taking. It seemed like an eye opener to many of us as to how much we were lagging behind. The worst possible feeling is when you do not know how to help the patient in front of you. And every medical student should study with that thought in mind. 

Baddie ke Baad. PC: Nammu.

:D

On the fitness front, Baddie in the mornings with Vindhya has been a way to keep fit. Maggie consumption has decreased drastically (I eat fruits while Nammu makes Maggi) and Coffee consumption is yet to begin (The milk+water+dicoction+heaps of sugar in the mess cannot be called coffee.)

In the past 10 days, we watched Bang Bang (for Hrithik Roshan) {speaking of whom, I have a new goal for the next 10 days. Hint: *Dance*}, Bangalore Days (Awwww) and Miss Congeniality (ma'am and I). Apart from this, I've spent 2 whole hours in the Library reading about Routes of Administration of Drugs and nothing else. The worrying thing is all the teachers want to ask questions in class or lab or postings, and that too randomly. (How did they guess it was the best way to freak me out?!)

Beepee, Deepu, Abhi and Me

Roomies. BangBang day. :)

And in the midst all this, there are juniors. And my god, they're a handful! So after the first week, there were plans for a Fresher's day [for the juniors, organized by the seniors (3rd and 4th term, boycotted by the 5th term (well, almost)] and slowly things began to fall in place. The last two days before the event (Udhbhava 2014) seemed like a mad rush and coordinating everything was certainly a logistical nightmare. There seemed to be a few hiccups but it was soon sorted out because in the end, the show must go on.

Being involved in such events can be a great opportunity to learn. Learn about people, from people and to be a better person. Sometimes, it's important to see good in every person. Even if it's easy not to. Doing that will make you a more tolerant person, I believe. Sometimes, when you see people really happy, you just want to step back and watch from a distance, because it seems too special to walk in on their moment. 

For the first time in a seemingly long time, I was criticized for my English and I'm glad that happened. I was probably getting too complacent that what I write sounds good, but the reality check actually made me improve. Apart from this, we had a lot of fun. That's the best part, without a doubt. And yes, of course, I extracted (and will continue to extract) chocolates as payment. ^_^

But first, Let Me Take A Selfie. :P

Abhi Abhii :)

So the show began formally (anchored by our batch people only, after some confusion) with a few speeches (by a junior, by me (we're thankful to have good seniors who guided us *cough-Vindhya-cough* and we intend to do the same to the juniors *cough-Joke-cough*) and by the dignitaries on stage (Classic FacePalm moment: the MD of the college says "We hope you will be better seniors to your juniors than the present seniors are to you.") and after this was the informal cultural events, stage based games and other "fillers". The juniors seemed a lot more confident and some of them showed real talent. After this was the Oath Taking Ceremony where the juniors were made to repeat a light-hearted oath which include these tenets:

• I will maintain my attendance at 75%, not less, not more.
• I will not make Biochemistry book my pillow.
• I will not read Anatomy in Physiology class.
• I will read the first 19 pages of Cunningham manual.
• I will prick myself for drawing blood for Hematology experiments.
• I will not marry before the age of 40.
• I will try my level best to like the mess food.
• I will watch the Atkins video instead of Bang Bang movie.
• I will learn to sleep with my eyes open.
• I will drink coffee or tea as frequently as water.

And so on.. After this was the DJ night and Kundu, Anu (only for a short while though) and I were DJ-night mates (just like last time.) Basically we didn't dance, we said we wouldn't dance. But at some point, we realized that this opportunity may not come again, hence we went out there are began mimicking the best dancer around for some basic moves until we remembered that we said we didn't know how to dance, so we came back to our seats. It was a night to remember, thanks to all the people who made it so special. :)

Selfie Spree. :P :D Rajesh, Anu, Govi and I (I look blind, I didn't know where the front camera was. -_-)

The next day we woke up hoping that there wouldn't be any classes but then that's too much to hope for, so we dragged ourselves out and made it to the classes and we were lucky enough to see our first patient (mentioned above). We had classes as usual , (Vaibhav Sir telling us about atrophy, physiological and pathological hypertrophies and also warning us not go binge drinking since he had seen some very disturbing accidents due to drunken driving) and Siddlingappa Sir telling us about the metabolism of the drug (and also that classes would be held on the 18th). 

Post the ritualistic nap, it was time to fulfill a promise. Although I threatened to treat in our canteen, we ended up at Bhatru Pani Puri after which I lost a bet to gulp down Masala Pepsi the fastest and we fought tooth and nail over Alpenliebes. In any case, this is the photographic evidence that my treat has been given (hence it can't be extracted again in future). Moreover, I deserve to be treated for such a bold/courageous/spunky deed. Sometimes, you shouldn't (in any case, I didn't) think too much. Nothing will seem right, everything might seem wrong and you'll never be happy. Just go with the flow, you might have a good time. :) What will come out of unwarranted introspection that will only create more doubts in your life? Spontaneity is good, it's different from reckless, though. Spontaneity adds variety to life. My speech ended with the lines, "It's good to have an end to the journey, but in the end, it's the journey that matters." Maybe I'm a destination kind of person, I don't know. But I can be a journey kind of person too. Maybe, they're both equally important.

Ay-Vi-Em, Masala Puri and Me.

Post snacks, I had dinner (stop gaping, I have healthy metabolism. I don't hog.) and it was time for Adios. Our train reached Bangalore in the early hours, next morning. All I've done since I set foot inside the house is sleep. It's actually bothering me that an individual can sleep so much in a single day. The best part is the surprises that Di had in store for me! :D

Cards, Crafts and more! <3

My phone has been failing me off late and owing to that (and the hectic few days), I haven't been able to contact anybody much (that includes home). Our room had the damned-est network possible and one could only message or receive calls if the mobiles were held in certain angles (which were certainly most inconvenient) and this left us loitering in the corriders, waving the phone frantically in the air, hoping to get that elusive network.

Some times, you grow over some acquaintances, some friendships. It's because one of the persons changes while the other doesn't. After that, it becomes awkward because you fail to see anything in common and you realize you've tried enough. I'm still in the process of figuring out what to do in such cases. You don't want to be rude, you don't want to pretend either.

I'm glad I blog. It makes me realize how lucky I am, how much I've got to improve and it helps me remember to be who I am, no matter what.

Apprehension.

This perfectly captures my current emotion. 

Bheemi's B'day!

College will begin soon. Mixed emotions alert. Overwhelmed by a sense of relief (that it's finally starting), excitement for what's in store and dread (for reasons best left unanswered.) Need to figure out a game plan for the coming term and get into the mode.

Transfer to Bangalore isn't an option anymore. *sigh* 

Behind the sarcasm, behind the sharp, cutting words, I probably agree. I just need to listen to my conscience and do the right thing. Sometimes the ones who hurt us the most probably mean the best for us.

As Hrithik Roshan aptly put it, "Don't be the nice guy, be the good guy.". 

In the past week, I've spent time at Vnagar (Gaadi scenes. B) ), met Athira and spent time with her, caught and donated a terrible cold and cough to all those around me, gone to Orion Mall in the gaadi (I'm surprised I even got permission!) and discovered that I suck at bowling. (I'm serious, I'm atrociously pathetic. Not that it's a major impediment anyway but still. -_- )

It's funny how badly I want(ed) college to start, but now that it finally will, I'm having a classic case of Cold Feet.

There are plenty of things I'll need to work on, getting my concepts clearer, for starters. Doing MCQs, keeping in touch and on par with other medico pals, acquiring more knowledge and retaining it, staying fit, staying on track, maintaining equilibrium between work and fun, keep more in contact with the Famili and.... the list is endless.

Why am I so thrilled about giving sweets to the librarians? It's because I had a mental cold war with them and I know from their looks that they thought I'm a nutcase who wouldn't clear the exams. -_-

Things I'm looking forward to: (Blogging is therapy for the panicking soul)

• Clinical postings!
• Surgeries!
• Baddie with Vindhya!
• Laibu (After one year of nearly living there, wouldn't you expect me to address it with a teensy bit of affection?)
• Fun times with the friends! 
• And.. I don't know what else.. just the college I guess. Do I like my college? I wish I could answer that. I honestly cannot be sure even after a year.

Toodles, dear reader. My lacrimal glands have been working idiopathically for some time now. It's about time I end this confused post.