Rediscovering, restarting, re-emerging.

 It's been so long since I did this, I'm not even sure if I know how to do this anymore. But maybe I can give it a try, for old times' sake.

So I somehow finished my postgraduation in Pediatrics. I say somehow, because I feel PG is just one step in the direction of Pediatrics. There's so much more to be learnt, along the way. It's a constant effort and one needs to keep at it to be updated as well as to keep recollect what we have read. There's also some difference between how things are done in different setups. Govt Vs Corporate Vs semi-private/community hospitals. Not that the essentials change, but the finer details probably. I'm reminded of how my professors at MMC would say how we would learn how things work once we go "out there".

It’s also been a learning experience for so many other reasons. Learning to live in a different town, trying to understand two different languages (whilst questioning yourself why your Kannada is not sufficient), learning to co-habit with another individual, understanding their way of life while also retaining the way you do things usually, and of course learning to share responsibilities, preparing healthy, wholesome meals (when possible), learning to live away from “home” and trying to build your own home in a different land and of course, learning to try and be there for your family despite the distance. I think the last bit is the hardest. But I’m trying.

Thankfully, the work environment is positive and encouraging, my senior colleagues are accommodative and supportive. I also enjoy being involved in the day to day Pediatric care and watching kids get better and go home. :)

Apart from the usual activities of cooking up interesting meals and taking walks in and around campus, I also dabble in art. It’s quite therapeutic to indulge in something that comes so naturally to me and I enjoy it for the process; if not for the outcome. 

On the reading front, I haven’t been reading a lot to be honest. I’ve got a nice shelf with a couple of books lined up but I think I’m mostly exhausted at the end of the day so I drift off to sleep before I make much progress. I’ve now started “Before the coffee gets cold” and let’s see how that goes.

Leaving you with a few images from in and around where I live. 

Backpacker Diaries

"Seriously?!" she asked me in surprise, "You're going alone all the way to Cochin?"

"Are you really going alone or is there something you're not telling me?" said another with a sly grin.

After my spontaneous decision to go backpacking resurfaced, it wasn't difficult to choose: Kochi or Alleppey since I wanted to travel God's Own Country.

After having a good look at the options at hand, I got the travel bookings done thanks to Abhi and BP, packed my bags for 4 odd days, borrowed some sunscreen and a good power bank and set off on yet another journey to explore!


The journey to Mangalore was a night bus and I managed to catch some shut eye despite the window sneaking in cold air as we rattled our way through the Ghats. The next morning after a quick "Wash and Brush" at the dingy bus stop and a simple breakfast, I headed to Mangalore Central, found my way to the right platform and boarded the 7:20 Ernad Express that starts from Mangalore, traverses through Kasargod, Thrissur, Kannur, Kozhikode, Cochin and Alleppey, all the way upto Tirunelveli. It was a pleasant journey with a scenic view of streams, canals, coconut fields and green fields and I reached Cochin by late evening, found myself an Uber and reached Zostel after a 45 minute drive through the city's bustling lanes, overlooking the lit up port and through the quieter neighbourhoods.

Cochin, the conglomeration of Ernakulam town, Mattancherry, Fort Kochi, Willingdon Island and a few other nearby islands, is historically famous its role as a trading centre, a thriving port town and the epicentre of cultural exchanges back in the day. The earliest visitors were probably the Chinese who are known for their most famous contribution to the city: Fishing Nets that dot the landscape of the sealine. After them, came the Arabs, followed by the Portuguese, the Dutch who brought Kochi to the international limelight as the hotspot of spice trade and a commercial hub. Lastly, the British arrived and mainly used it as a colonial settlement but not before it had made a lasting impression in the international circuit for its trade relations. 



So in retrospect, it made perfect sense to me that I had Americans, South Asians and Europeans as roommates and subsequently interacted with a diverse lot in the following day! I opted to go on a boat ride in the morning and we were joined by new travelers along the way until we reached Vaikom. 

Thampi, our guide, told us about the agenda for the day and we set off in two small boats (or canoes) through the backwaters, gently sailing through the narrower canals even as the tree lined canopy shaded us from the heat of the sun. Water snakes, washerwomen and bathing children greeted us along the way until we disembarked at one of the settlements to have a look at the spices like cardomom, clove, bay leaf and nutmeg. We had a glimpse of how coir was made (Unity is Strength was the take home message) and later had a traditional Kerala lunch on a plantain leaf.

During the course of the day, I spent time with my roomates, Gaby and her friend who were Americans working as teachers in Thailand and we shared some light moments and 'rice crackers', a crispy snack from Thailand. There was Naomi and her friend from England who were friendly and we bonded when I realized Naomi was a doctor and wanted to pursue Tropical Medicine. Then there was blue eyed Robin and his friend Yohaan from Germany who were students on a vacation and Ponya, also from Germany who had traveled across the length and breadth of our country. There was a pretty young girl, Anna also from Britain who was on a gap year after finishing high school. Coming to India was a revelation of sorts for her since this was where her parents met when they were in college. Then there was the All American couple, John and Debbie, who were pleasantly surprised to know that I was from Bangalore and not in IT. I learnt a little about the american healthcare system and also why medical tourism in India is picking up rapidly. The web designer from Paris had some stories to share about his stay in Sao Paulo and Germany while Lee, the American shared his experience and photos of the Aarthi at Varanasi. While he worked as a limousine driver for half the year, the other half was (wisely) spent in traveling across the world. 

Post the boat ride, I met another Asian, Nanthini, from Malaysia who was also on a solo trip and we watched a beautiful sunset by the beachside. I was glad to have a fellow companion as we ventured around Kochi at our pace. Perhaps it was the Asian connection or just two individuals bonding over their love for travel but either way, ai was glad to have found a comrade. In a way, Kochi was and still is, the melting pot of many cultures as it continues to attract travelers, tourists, businessmen and artists alike. 

The following day, Nanthini and I made a neat plan thanks to the folks at Zostel and we began with a visit to the Mattancherry/ Dutch palace which houses intricate murals and a lot of artefacts that detail the era of the Kerala rulers. It detailed the lineage of Raja Rama Varma, the matriarchal system, their weapons, wardrobe and a general preview of the life they lead. 


After this we took a walk down the Jew Town and shopped judiciously for curios. A customary visit to the Synagogue showed us a few paintings that explain the role of Jews in Cochin, their arrival, trials and triumphs. For lunch, we headed to Fusion Bay where Nanthini got her much awaited fish curry cooked in the traditional Kerala style with a hint of Mango while I was content with some Okra Masala and Malabar Parota. Post lunch, we rested awhile at Santa Cruz Basilica, refreshed at Zostel and then headed to Kerala Kathakali Centre. 

Kathakali is an ancient dance form originating in Kerala as a variant of Krishnanattam under the then king's support. It is known for its detailed makeup and costume efforts, intricate facial expressions, mudras (hand movements) that signify different meanings and the enactment of a story from any mythological tale such as the Ramayana or Mahabharatha with drum beats, cymbals and vocals to accompany the performance. Kathakali performances are traditionally known to last for several hours and generally involve only male artists. 

We arrived in time to watch the make up in progress which every performer applied by himself for the most part. We were taken through the basics of Kathakali before we began with the story depiction. With rhythmic drumbeats, spirited use of cymbals and intense expressions, it was a complete performance that left one wanting more. 




After dinner at a nearby cafe and bidding goodbye to my newly found friends, I struck up a conversation with my Uber driver as we made our way back to Ernakulam Junction Railway Station for the Maveli Express. A nursing student, he was surprised that someone would travel alone but I think I made some valid points in my defense and appeared to be more open to the idea by the end of the journey. 

A delayed train journey, some Ideal Gudbud for breakfast in Mangalore and a bus ride later, I was back to the comfort of my room in Shimoga with a cartload of memories and the unmistakable self confidence that comes when you know you are independent. :)

PS: Half the pictures are courtesy of Nanthini's photography skills and the rest are probably the last works of my phone as it lies on its deathbed. :P

This Or That.

They say I think in binaries. 0 or 1. Black or White. Good or Bad. Necessary or Unnecessary.  I see no in between, no intermediate entity. I have always had clear cut definitions. I don’t like blurriness; be it in my vision or in my perspectives. This is how I’ve always been. Do I want to change that? I don’t think so. That perhaps explains the uneasiness that gnaws within me.

There is so much I want to do. Am I really working in that direction? Or am I just working and waiting for everything to miraculously materialize? Ugh, I don’t know where this is stemming from but I’m feeling a lot of discontentment about myself. Is it probably inversely proportional to how ‘happy’ I momentarily feel?

I pride myself for my ability to not be influenced by the choices of those around me. It is one trait I hold close to myself hence, I’m pondering if I am consciously responsible for my actions or have I been influenced by those around me, willingly or unwillingly. 

Gokarna, March 2017 with Abhi and BP.

I don’t have the answers to any of these. I know I think too much, trust me, I don’t like it either that my brain keeps churning out such inane rubbish in the midst of an Aortic Aneurysm and I tuck away these thoughts in a tiny cubicle in my brain, assuring it that I will open the Pandora’s Box once I get the time to blog about it. :)

I want to talk a lot more but I don’t know if this is the medium to unload all my burdens, but it makes sense to reflect to oneself instead of somebody else because you will eventually hear an opinion, an advice, a suggestion or better still, a similarity in thought. All of which is unnecessary when all you need is a mirror. A plain mirror to lay the bare truth in front of your eyes; with all its ugliness, its scars, bruises and perfect imperfections. And that cannot come from anyone but me. (To cut a long story short, I find it as important, or probably more important to understand myself, consolidate my thoughts and be a whole person by myself than anything else. 

Or is this defensive attitude stemming from my fear of being influenced by new ideas and thoughts? 

What is nice may not be necessary and what is necessary may not be nice. 

In the end, nothing matters except what you believe in, what you stand for and what you do.

Subtleties are always better. I could write a million lines on everything I can imagine, which a far more powerful tool than reality is. I want my imagination back. I find much more beauty in metaphors, in an indefinite entity than in the raw face of reality. 
Maybe. 

And that reminds me;

http://scienceblogs.com/mixingmemory/2006/07/17/the-cognitive-science-of-art-r/

Read under ‘Perceptual Problem Solving’. I remember reading those very lines in VS Ramachandran’s Emerging Mind.

On an unrelated note, the marriage seems to have bitten the GRS family cousins as 2* more have fallen for the trap and wedding bells shall be ringing throughout this year. 

Jogging everyday hasn’t helped in physically (Let’s be honest :P ) but it certainly elevates my mood and automatically trashes all the clutter that I tend to attract with a magnet. -_-

Can’t wait to meet my super-achieving Minnulli over this month end (hopefully). :)

Bye Bye Old Faithful :)

(Trust me I’m not a raving lunatic who fondly addresses a virtual entity and distances actual people who listen to her. I just like me more.) 

Tripping scenes. :D

Hello there!

So 8th March 2015 was our class trip to Manipal, Udupi, St Mary’s Island and Maple Beach (after much debating, planning and procrastination)!

On Saturday, we went out to the city after what seemed like forever and when we came back, the college was a riot of colours! Yes, half the students from both the hostels were out on the roads enjoying Holi. It was virtually impossible to recognize anybody given that everybody was caked in different shades and drenched in water (possibly sourced from the lake beside our college) and we faced the imminent threat of also being smeared with colours so we decamped to the mess and then watched the proceedings from a vantage point.

Post dinner, the excitement was in the air and the localites had arrived to stay overnight since we would be leaving early in the morning. At midnight, there was a bonfire organized at the girls’ hostel (but I happened to walk in when the embers were dying down) as a run-up to all the excitement that awaited us.

We left the campus gates by 4am by chanting praises of Mr Y (BP’s idea) and for a substantial part of the journey, we sang songs and had an Antakshari of sorts. This was our first such trip and for many people, it was the first such journey with friends.

At the crack of dawn we got out for a short break and soak in the wilderness of the Ghat section but we were shooed inside after being threatened that tigers roamed this region.  (-_-) We halted at Manipal for breakfast and then proceeded towards the Museum of Anatomy and Pathology which has a wide variety of specimens that makes for a great viewing. Post this, we chilled for a while at their food court (Govi’s treat. For? Errr. First year mbbs result :P)and then we set of towards the harbour. Prior to this there was another stop where most of the people had lunch (i.e savoured some sea food) whereas Abhi, BP and I clowned around on a random street. (That includes waving at random passers-by, striking the Titanic pose at the middle of the road and so on.. Don’t bother judging me, I do it myself all the time anyway!) We took the ferry ride to St Mary’s Island which was pleasant given that it wasn’t sunny at all.

Abhi and I at Manipal :)

On the island we (Kundur and I) went on the jet ski which was not scary as it was touted to be. After this, we were on a Spree! A photo-clicking spree at every possible place, in every possible angle, with and w/o shades, with and w/o the hats and so on! Just like DJ night, Kundu and I were the perfect team for the Island leg of the trip! Nevertheless, we had a good time and enjoyed the serenity of the place.

Some Cliche' Photoshoot :P

After this, we went to Malpe Beach were a considerable amount of time was spent in pondering whether or not we should get into the water, whether or not we should go for some of the rides and walking around (with difficulty) on the sand. But soon, we were walking on the beach, enjoying the waves, the setting sun and the cool breeze that provided a respite from the glaring heat during the day.

Kundur and I

We halted again at Manipal for Dinner and most people chose from the three options: KFC, Pizza Hut and Dominoes. It was time for another treat (from AVM, for clearing the 1st mbbs exams) and it was rather fun. (Despite the fact that I had almost shut down after all the excitement)

The journey back to college was mostly uneventful except when the driver put on some blaring music (that is still ringing in my ears like persistent tinnitus) and switched on the lights to ward off sleep. But soon, that too came to an end and we found ourselves at the gates of SIMS at 3:30am. It was all over. Our much awaited class trip had come to an end!

The hardest part was getting up at 7am the next day and attending the theory classes at 8am and ENT postings for another 3 hours.

Initially I was reluctant and had assumed the worst possible outcome of the trip but as Icabo, Makshi and Gimpi had predicted, everything turned out just fine. True, half the people were with their “better half” and everybody moved in close knit gangs but it didn’t matter anyway (I had feared that it would). You need to go with the flow and not cling on to your comfort zone. That’s how you’ll find happiness irrespective of who you’re with.