Ho Hum

I have to state that this post will have no value add whatsoever. It's just me exercising my freedom of speech, freedom of rant and freedom of cynicism.

So now that my cough seems to show signs of abating (yes, I've finally learnt to titre smaller doses of cough syrup), I am in a far better state of health. The annoying thing is when you're down with a fever/cough you don't want to go to the OPD because you tend to think; hey should I really go for something trivial like this, maybe I can handle this myself. Except the cough needs better antibiotics, so yeahh.

Wayanad is not happening after all and after a few days of moping around, I've come to accept that we have a lot on our plate at the moment so perhaps it was not meant to be.

We do see a lot more cases in medicine postings these days,

• A case of fibrocavitary lesion in the right upper lobe due to reactivation of tuberculosis in a middle aged chronic smoker.
• A case of hydropneumothorax and swelling of limbs with h/o tuberculosis treatment.
• A case of syncopal attack in a middle aged patient of Aortic Stenosis and Mitral Regurgitation.
• A case of global aphasia and hip fracture in an elderly patient after h/o fall but recovered after a few days.
• A case of alcoholic liver disease in a middle aged woman.
• A case of emphysema with h/o ischemic heart disease in an emanciated elderly patient.

So we have a marathon of internals coming up in the next 2 weeks. After that we'll hopefully have some sort of study holidays until our exams.

My policy has become it is better to be asleep than to sit up and think endlessly. I'm not saying its working great but I think I'd rather not be entrapped by the web of worries I spin around myself. It's been one year and I ask myself have I become any wiser? Have I changed for the better or worse? You imbibe the good, ignore the bad and remain true to yourself. It's safer to avoid these questions and plough on.

To be honest, I feel, education is no prophylaxis for stupidity! Wisdom comes from practical knowledge and common sense, not something that poring through endless books would teach you.

Successful people are not the ones who never make mistakes, they're the ones who aren't afraid to make mistakes but also pick themselves up and get back after a fall.

Another thing that I've realized is that its important to discover yourself, work on building your strengths, develop better communication skills and have good hobbies. Somehow, at the end of the day, you should be able to hold a good conversation, have a good set of friends to share your best moments and have a sense of humour. Or atleast, retain some 'spirit' in life no matter how hectic or gruelling your schedule will eventually be. Because, at the end of the day, why do you put yourself through all the rigor? To lose enthusiasm in life? Of course not! Nothing is worth that.
Bottom line: Learn to stop and smell the roses. :)

So we watched snippets of this Telugu movie Arjun Reddy (don't worry, I still have my prejudice against the language) and we had a lot of fun poking fun at the blockbuster movie that seems to have got rave reviews for its depiction of 'raw reality'.

I also watched the Good Doctor from the makers of House MD and yet again another stunningly attractive set of doctors are busy saving lives peforming complicated surgeries and having a great social life a la Grey's Anatomy except there is an autistic doctor with Savant Syndrome also in the fray.

Songs on my mind include:

• Build it better : Aron Wright
• Seetha Kalyanam : Suraj S Kurup
• O Rangrez (from Bhaag Milka Bhaag)

"That's the thing. I don't think I kind of believe in deep down. I kinda think all you are is the things that you do."

This Or That.

They say I think in binaries. 0 or 1. Black or White. Good or Bad. Necessary or Unnecessary.  I see no in between, no intermediate entity. I have always had clear cut definitions. I don’t like blurriness; be it in my vision or in my perspectives. This is how I’ve always been. Do I want to change that? I don’t think so. That perhaps explains the uneasiness that gnaws within me.

There is so much I want to do. Am I really working in that direction? Or am I just working and waiting for everything to miraculously materialize? Ugh, I don’t know where this is stemming from but I’m feeling a lot of discontentment about myself. Is it probably inversely proportional to how ‘happy’ I momentarily feel?

I pride myself for my ability to not be influenced by the choices of those around me. It is one trait I hold close to myself hence, I’m pondering if I am consciously responsible for my actions or have I been influenced by those around me, willingly or unwillingly. 

Gokarna, March 2017 with Abhi and BP.

I don’t have the answers to any of these. I know I think too much, trust me, I don’t like it either that my brain keeps churning out such inane rubbish in the midst of an Aortic Aneurysm and I tuck away these thoughts in a tiny cubicle in my brain, assuring it that I will open the Pandora’s Box once I get the time to blog about it. :)

I want to talk a lot more but I don’t know if this is the medium to unload all my burdens, but it makes sense to reflect to oneself instead of somebody else because you will eventually hear an opinion, an advice, a suggestion or better still, a similarity in thought. All of which is unnecessary when all you need is a mirror. A plain mirror to lay the bare truth in front of your eyes; with all its ugliness, its scars, bruises and perfect imperfections. And that cannot come from anyone but me. (To cut a long story short, I find it as important, or probably more important to understand myself, consolidate my thoughts and be a whole person by myself than anything else. 

Or is this defensive attitude stemming from my fear of being influenced by new ideas and thoughts? 

What is nice may not be necessary and what is necessary may not be nice. 

In the end, nothing matters except what you believe in, what you stand for and what you do.

Subtleties are always better. I could write a million lines on everything I can imagine, which a far more powerful tool than reality is. I want my imagination back. I find much more beauty in metaphors, in an indefinite entity than in the raw face of reality. 
Maybe. 

And that reminds me;

http://scienceblogs.com/mixingmemory/2006/07/17/the-cognitive-science-of-art-r/

Read under ‘Perceptual Problem Solving’. I remember reading those very lines in VS Ramachandran’s Emerging Mind.

On an unrelated note, the marriage seems to have bitten the GRS family cousins as 2* more have fallen for the trap and wedding bells shall be ringing throughout this year. 

Jogging everyday hasn’t helped in physically (Let’s be honest :P ) but it certainly elevates my mood and automatically trashes all the clutter that I tend to attract with a magnet. -_-

Can’t wait to meet my super-achieving Minnulli over this month end (hopefully). :)

Bye Bye Old Faithful :)

(Trust me I’m not a raving lunatic who fondly addresses a virtual entity and distances actual people who listen to her. I just like me more.) 

Experimental Evidence.

So this post is going be vague but I’d still like to go on anyway.

Mysore for the weekend and we (BP and I) stayed at Abhi’s place after sudden plans. We had a great time around Mysore. Highlights include ADHM, walking along a birdy Lake, climbing Chamundi Hills and the spine-chilling Well of Death!

The Well Of Death is basically a death defying stunt where bikes and cars move perpendicular to the ground in a circular well aided by centripetal force.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wall_of_death

I’m also super obsessed with the movie ADHM that’s managed to generate a lot of interest. I’ve watched the movie twice and I think I might go in for a third viewing. I’ve also been interested in understanding how people perceived this movie which explains why I’ve been reading a zillion reviews including one from the Pakistani News baron Dawn about how Fawad Khan was unfairly given lesser screen time compared to Ranbir to another that calls Karan Johar a fraud for romanticizing self-harm and abuse. Yes, I’ve been reading a lot of opinions and none of them seem wrong, there’s some truth in all of them, just as there is some truth in the movie, as far-fetched as it ends up.

I’m also super thrilled about this weekend even though it’s going to be yet another ‘flying visit’ but wedding bells in the family finally! :)

I've begun reading Manga and I realized how it seems like another universe altogether! Somehow, I never got around to reading Manga or watching Anime (even though Nirupama was a big fan and I had heard about it..) so I decided to undo that mistake and get a brief intro into this new realm and it look to be an interesting medium of storytelling. :) 

I’d also take this opportunity to make a mention to the sanest statement made by the fairly insane AyKay when I was glorifying my (un)saintly deeds. A simple “Do you need a medal?” made look at the lighter side. Speaking of (ir)rational experiments, I am proving to be of better scientific temperament *cough* than I anticipated. :’) 

Toodles,

Surgery Tomorrow, FYI *shrieks*

YOLO

There’s just so much going on lately that there’s been no time to sit down and blog it out  and yet the urge to pen down my thoughts only gets stronger.

I probably can’t provide a detailed account of everything that’s happened lately but here are the highlights:

• Aynur scenes on Manjushri’s Gaadi with Abhi (all because we didn’t want to stay on campus on that particular evening). We went ahead by 13kms and then realized that we’d already crossed Aynur so we drove back and then made our way to Aynur Dam (which doesn’t exist. It’s a lake which was drying up) but nevertheless we had a good time racing on the highway until the gaadi became all wobbly!

                          

 

• Home scenes: I’ve been going home every 10 days or so and things are improving only very slightly. Bheemi is bored at home since Science camp is over, the 3 day outdoor camp is also over and there’s nothing to do other than bug the birds or Ma. I’m not sure where things are headed but I’ve got the knack of filtering out these worries from my brain and feeding new ones when I get back to college. I wish I could spend more time with her given how she doesn’t play with the neighbourhood kids or by herself. The comparisons with the present scenario and the seemingly idyllic childhood that I had only puts more pressure on everyone and I hope once school starts, the usual routine will put everyone back in gear.

• Mama and his Toastmasters:

I haven’t spoken much about the famous Balu Mama (yep, he’s quite famous among my friends) here and this seems like a good time. So being the CFO of Fidelity, he is definitely a busy man but his dedication to his passion is noteworthy. Initially it was music and he made time for it and attended the classes in the midst of tiny tots and improved gradually. Today he sings well during Karaoke sessions at home with other fellow music lovers.

About 2 years ago, he took up Toastmasters to improve his public speaking skills given how he is required to speech to large gathering in his work capacity. I’ve been listening to his speeches and reading his scripts from his early days and I can only marvel at the improvement he has shown over time. The effort he puts in for every weekly speech is noteworthy given how he spends most of his time at office or in transit. These days he is participating in competitions and making waves in the Toastmaster circles. Given how he is now mastering the finer nuances of the art of oration, I can no longer provide any criticism to his speeches.

The other day we were at Cubbon for Di’s mountaineering class and Mama presented his speech. He describes how in his college days, cricket was his passion and in one such match, he was fielding and his arch rival was batting. While the ball came in his direction and he caught in the nick of time, not many knew that it had crossed the boundary line. While that remained within him and nagged him in spite of winning the match, it was only later in life did he face the bigger challenge.

While working in one of the international banks in his younger days, he was offered a senior position if he agreed to certain terms and conditions. On closer looks, he realized what they expected of him was unacceptable and would only land him in a soup later. It was a tough choice and the promise of luxury was inviting but the burden of guilt would be too much and nothing was worth the peace of mind he could have. Thus he left and began working is way up all over again in Fidelity.

Thus, we are often faced with tough decisions in life, sometimes the line between what is right and what is wrong is a thin one and not everyone might appreciate it but as long as you can see the line, you need to exert your will power and do the right thing.

I’m also thankful to him for making a huge difference in the light of recent events. Words cannot express how his timely intervention softened Pa’s stance. I only shudder to think of how things would have progressed if not for him. Whatever he said definitely had an impact and made Pa look at things slightly more broadly.

• Demedcon 2016

So we attended the Neurology workshop and the quiz at Devraj Urs Medical College. BP, Govi and I had a good time.

• Abhi and Avm were in Bangalore in the same week and we all (including BP and Govi) spent some time together. Di and I joined them later at BlueO and we spent time bowling, Di had some Gaadi scenes of her own and then headed home. Di did a lot of photography and turns out she was not half bad. The evening was memorable one but the evening didn’t go along expected lines but maybe hoping for it to was just my foolishness.

• There are plenty of thoughts running in my mind but I don’t think they deserve the importance of me brooding over them. Nothing is constant. It’s all about priorities. Happiness is a choice, a conscious decision and once you make it, it's not about the circumstances you are in. It's about the way you choose to react to it. A wise frog once said, react to yourself and not for others. It's best to deal with your thoughts within your own cranium rather than expecting others to understand. 

• I participated in the 5K Speakathon on May 1 which was to raise funds for the speech and hearing centre in Shimoga. A good number of people turned up and several of our professors were all set for a good jog on a Sunday morning. So Shobith was also participating in the event so he picked us (Akkamma, Varsha and I) and we registered and got our Tees. It wasn't all that tiring and we jogged/ brisk walked for the most part and got our certificates. After the mandatory photo session we all parted ways. It was a good start to the day and definitely a great initiative in Shimoga. I wish I was fit enough to participate in the 10k! Maybe next year :)

• And the countdown begins! I’m thrilled to bits about the upcoming trip and can’t wait for this vacation. After all the uncertainty and confusion in the past 2 months, all I want to do is explore new territory and get lost in the midst of nature! I’m going to stay off the radar (hopefully) and do some much needed soul searching. Paediatric postings are at stake but then, you just can’t let go of some opportunities…. :P  

ENT internals are coming up over this weekend but all I can think of is what lies ahead. It’s about time I get back to Semicircular canals and turbinates.

Simultanagnosia

So I was reading up on a few new things and I came across this word:

Simultanagnosia

Technically it means “missing the forest for the trees”. Person fails to comprehend an object as a whole and can only perceive only parts of it. A person might look at a table lamp but fail to recognize it for what it is. He or she sees the base of the lamp and assumes it to be something else, like a box or an ashtray. Isn’t that what happens to us sometimes? We get so caught up in little things that we fail to move on to see the bigger picture. What I mean is, don’t let bogged down by petty things, there’s a lot more waiting for you if you change the way you see things. Don’t narrow your vision to just the bare minimum, think of what lies ahead and stay motivated. Sometimes, Life requires us to focus on the finer details but sometimes you need to have a bird’s eye view of the big picture.

Childhood is synonymous with playing outdoors and cuts, bruises and scars and perhaps the trophies of a childhood well spent. I’ve got scars on my knees that’ll last a lifetime thanks to rolling down a road while being chased by dogs and during cycle rides. I remember the one over the knee took awfully long to heal and formed a thick brown scab that I prematurely peeled off until the process had to be repeated. Why am I describing an ugly scar that occurred more than a decade ago? My point is, wounds need time to heal and it’s not something you can rush through. Imagine if I had put a plaster over and continued cycling like the wound didn’t exist? Sure, it wouldn’t look messy initially but eventually the wound would just get worse and take longer to heal. Sometimes it’s important to acknowledge a wound and take steps to treat it. Ignorance IS NOT always bliss in such cases!

People will walk in and out of your life according to their will and wish unless you stand guard and latch the doors. Beware of intruders and don’t be surprised if insiders chose to decamp without notice. Yet, remember that there is always a silver lining. Just when you’re at your wit’s end, Life will surprise you with something that will brighten you up in spite of the thunderstorm. Remember to be thankful for those moments of happiness in the middle of uncertainty, for those people who share their umbrella in the rain and for most of all, remember to believe. Just believe, in yourself, your dreams and your principles.

Literary Ventures:

Eleventh Commandment: Jeffrey Archer
Vision in White: Nora Roberts
The Secret Countess: Eva Ibbotson
Anna Karenina: Tolstoy
Animal Farm: George Orwell
Hitchhiker's Guide: Douglas Adams
Contact: Carl Sagan

Musicophilia:

Sanam Re: Arijit Singh
Pyaasi: Swarathma
Aayat: Arijit Singh
Same Old Love: Selena Gomez

SFCBR: (Early blog readers, you may be familiar with this term)

On a positive note, it is indeed great *giggle* to get back in touch with old, long lost friend and realise that some people don’t change. It’s actually mind blowing to think that though it’s been 13 long years, good people remain inherently the same as they were. Indeed, a pleasant surprise :D It’s also refreshing to see so much positivity and faith in your abilities :’) I also reconnected with Punyakoti after a long time.

Auf Wiedershen (Germanic influence lol)

Playing With Fire.

How foolish could I be to think that I can dissociate from an intrinsic component of myself and assume that I will be fine? Yes, you can amputate the limb but there's no running away from the Phantom pain. There are some things that have become so ingrained in my persona that any attempt to bring about changes will only lead to chaos.

Exams are approaching and I'm supposed to be in hyper-study mode but that doesn't always happen. There are days when I study and I'm happy with what I've read and there are days when I attempt to study but nothing seems to diffuse through the scalp.

These days I've been reading about pathogenic protozoa like Entamoeba, Trypanosoma, Leishmania, Malaria and so on. Malaria for example has a life cycle in the female anopheles mosquito as well in the human host. The bite of the mosquito transfers the sporozoite to the human and this ends up in the liver where the pre-erythrocytic cycle occurs. The meront is formed which later bursts to release merozoites that penetrate the RBC and develop through 3 stages. The trophozoite that is formed matures and upon the bite of the mosquito, it is transferred to the gut of the mosquito in its blood meal. Here the sexual reproduction (sporogony) occurs and there is a zygote formed from the male and female trophozoite that enters into the salivary gland of the mosquito and is transferred to the human host in its next bite. There are 4 major forms of Plasmodium species, P.Vivax, P. Falciparum, P.Ovale and P. Malariae with Falciparum being associated with the highest mortality (Blackwater Fever) and generally presents with fever, chills and sweats that recur periodically. 

So apart from these there are several other protozoans like Toxoplasma that reaches a dead end in the human host. The definitive host being cats and other felines, the infective sporulated oocyst is transferred to humans through any contamination in food and water and it later develops from bradyzoites to tachyzoites  that later form tissue cysts. These are particularly notorious in the immunocompromised and cause life threatening complications when it is congenital like the 3CS: Chorioretinitis, Cerebral calcifications and Convulsions. 

Apart from these there are also creepy crawlies to deal with, their pathogenicity and clinical features being distinct. Some of them worms I've been reading include Diphyllobothrium latum (Fish Tapeworm- it has 3 hosts. It affects humans and then is transmitted to (as coracidium and then procercoid larva) cyclops from where it reaches fish (pleurocercoid) which is consumed by man and the cycle continues..), Echinococcus Granulosus (Dog Tapeworm- where man is only an accidental host and it results in formation of hydatid cysts in the liver and other sites), Taenia solium, Taenia saginata (beef and pork tapeworm that cause complications like neurocysticercosis through its cytsic forms: cysticercus bovis and cysticercus cellulosae) and so on. There's so much more to do in so little time and what's more important is also revising what I've read instead of just going on and on! -_-

Before this, it was Virology and that was quite interesting. Viruses are usually RNA or DNA or in the rare cases of retro viruses (HIV) it's a DNA:RNA virus that forms the genetic material. Viruses can causes almost all sorts of infections:
CNS: KJD, GSS, Rhabdo, Polio
Respiratory: Adenovirus, Rhinovirus, SARS, Orthomyxovirus,
Diarrhoea: Reovirus? Norwalk, Astrovirus..
Haemorrhagic: Arena virus, Ebola, KFD
and so on...

Coming to Pharmacology, there is SIMPLY WAY TOO MUCH! It's not a problem to read up on the new chapters but what is definitely a problem is revising all the drugs we've been reading in the course of one whole year! Just take the names, they sound so familiar, similar and yet so confusing! Take Amiloride, Amiodarone and Amantadine.

• Amiloride is a diuretic that acts at the Collecting Ducts and inhibits the renal epithelial Na+ channels and thus causes diuresis. (I think)

• Amiodarone is a broad spectrum anti-arrhythmic. I think it belongs to class II antiarrythmics and can be used for a wide range of arrhythmias. 

• Amantadine on the other hand is a multipurpose drug: It was introduced as an antiviral drug for treatment of influenza (mechanism is probably something to do with the Neuraminidase and Hemagglutinin antigens on the virus) but was serendipitously found to have anti-parkinsonian effects. It complements the action of Levo-Dopa and can probably used in the early stages. (I think)

• Now Amantadine rhymes with Cimetidine and Ranitidine but don't be confused because those are H2 Proton pump blockers which you would prescribe for Peptic Ulcers and gastritis because they reduce the gastric acid secretions. 

• Similarly, there is Metronidazole, Tinidazole, Satranidazole, Secnidazole that are used in the treatment of amoebic dysentery (E.histolytica) because they have this nitro group that goes inside the Amoeba, gets activated and attracts all the electrons so that the Pyruvate-Ferrodoxin Oxido-Reductase Pathway (PFOR) is inhibited so this ultimately has -cidal action on the pathogen. These are effective in anaerobic conditions if there were to be oxygen they themselves would compete with the nitro group for the electrons.. But don't confuse this with Ketoconazole, Fluconazole, Itraconazole or Voriconazole because these are antifungals that act by inhibiting the cell wall synthesis (I think!)

 I could go on and on and I might actually do more of this sometime :)

Pathology is progressing at snail's pace. I recently read about pathological conditions of the kidney and this itself spanned several days because of its convoluted nature (pun intended). In many cases, the diseases are a classic example of "Subversion from within" as Robbins describes the pathogenicity in HIV-AIDS. For no good reason, antibodies are formed against the basement membrane of the glomeruli and with similar auto-antibodies in the lung, you have your Good-Pasture Syndrome. And then there are immune complexes formed which are deposited giving rise to conditions like HSP and Lupus Nephritis..
Basically there are two clinical presentations:

• Nephrotic : Proteinuria, Lipiduria and Edema
• Nephritic  : Proteinuria, Haematuria and Hypertension

Apart from the glomerular, interstitial and tubular dysfunctions there are neoplasms (Renal Cell Ca), cysts (ADPKD ARPKD), hydronephrosis and so on.. 

Recently a strange thought struck my otherwise dormant frontal lobe. The water we drink is said to be "purified" thanks to the aquaguard water purifiers in the hostel as well as in the college. But nobody really looks into the maintenance of these purifiers or the steel containers that store the water. The water we consume no doubt has some bacteria. So what we could do is do a Coliform Count and also culture the bacteria in several media hoping to see which bacteria turns up. So there are two schools of thought with which we could proceed:

• The water we're drinking is fairly harmless so if the reports show presence of any bacteria it would mean our body has developed some level of resistance of these bacteria over time. This could be compared to water supply in a fairly cleaner source and see if there is any pathogenicity of these bacteria in a different region.
• The second approach would be to see if the water we're drinking has actually caused any disease in the hostelites and identify the causative bacteria. Has the bacteria evolved to evade the purification and become resistant? Again, one could compare with another water source and observe the trends.

As Uppi Sir said, it is a viable project (that I could attempt after 2nd year even if that means it can't be an ICMR project because the deadline for ICMR would be January when I'd be in the middle of practical exams) and I could work on it with the available resources provided and "define the problem" and then work on it. Whenever we begin any such project, it is very important to ferment the ideas into something definitive. What is the purpose of the project, what do you aim to find on microscopic analysis, how would you choose to analyse the data, how are you going to compare this with other water sources and what's the bottom line? One needs to have definitive answers before embarking on something new like this. 

Moving on to matters of the heart and conveniently ignoring Forensic Medicine which I need to read more of, I seem to be in a perpetual state of confusion and disappointment. 

I either have an inherent genetic defect in maintaining relationships- mutated MHR gene (Maintain Healthy Relationship) that probably explains why sometimes somethings never work out with some people. Or maybe I don't put enough into it or don't make amends or I expect too much from people or I just end up with the wrong people! 

Looking back always brings regret, which is why I try my best to steer my hyperkinetic thoughts in the right direction, but then there are times when you wish you had done things differently. I have this "Äll or None" personality. I either give my 100% and give my best to make things work or I don't try at all. I need to find the comfortable middle ground where you stay at a comfortable distance and maintain a better equation with people. 

There are times when I crave for silence. Silence from the chaos of my thoughts that are constantly in motion like electrons colliding against each other in Brownian motion. I crave for some solidarity of my thoughts, some respite from the constant tug of war that distracts me from anything I do. It stems from disappointment: a feeling of repulsion and disgust to who I've become against the stark contrast of who I wish I would be. Adapting to people and circumstances constantly has suppressed the true nature of me. There are moments like these, in these fleeting moments, in the scribbled notes of a story incomplete or an amateur attempt at poetry that I find myself. It is in this silence that I can sense creativity bubbling within me, hoping to find an outlet.

As someone rightly said (or as I understood it), sometimes you need to talk to people. The world feels less of a burden and much more bearable. In my case, it is my blog that I turn to, sad as it seems that it is a mere virtual entity. An imaginary non-existent figament that purportedly contains my thoughts without any reaction but giving me the satisfaction of having unburdened myself. Words, thoughts and ideas are the fuel of my existence. They define who I am and they help me evolve and discover more.Yet, trying to do away with even this mode of release is just slow asphyxia. Like the Carbon Dioxide that we need to exhale out of our system (before it can stimulate the Respiratory Centre in the brain, preferentially bind to the Hb and wreak havoc), my has invariably become a lifeline. A creative process that has become a part of who I am. In the past, the blog was a mere glimpse of who I am. Over time, it has evolved into something more concrete. It's either that, or I've officially gone NUTS. :D It would only be self-destructive to stifle my voice against the waves of conformity. 

I cannot run away from the consequence of my actions, I can only make peace with myself. I cannot rebel against what I chose, I can only accept the reality. In the end, we are not defined by those around us because they are never constant. So there is no point pondering infinitely about how we are perceived by people who do not eventually matter.

What I Do In The Library

• Mature is when you are polite with the people you don’t really get along with because it seems the right thing to do but it’s mistaken as fake.
• Natural is when someone behaves in a certain way that is perceived to be fake by those around him/her. Example: some people have a fake laugh.
• Opportunistic Faking is taking advantage of a situation for your benefit by saying things you do not mean. *Sycophants*
• Synergistic Faking: Two people playing along for a mutual benefit

On a lighter note, I have discovered that I have a rare but seriously awkward condition known as Paroxysmal Laughter Syndrome (PLS). The genetic causes have not yet been established but they occur due to a sporadic mutation in the SNL gene. (Sane and Normal Laughter) Going back to the basics, I read in Vilayanur Ramachandran's neuroscience books that laughter is the body's way of recognizing a false alarm. A mother approaches her 8 month old child with arms outstretched and a serious expression. The baby is surprised and worried that it has done something wrong. As the mother approaches closer, her expression softens and she suddenly takes to tickling the child. The child bursts into peals of laughter at this and creases of fear vanish. Why is it that the child laughed? What is the neurological basis behind this sound produced by the larnyx when we notice a funny incident? The idea is that in the course of evolution over centuries, laughter has evolved as a mechanism of letting the body know that "It's all okay, no harm done". The brain had expected some danger but the turn of events proved contrary and hence we burst into high pitched giggles or happy squeals or sometimes into a loud cackle that causes bystanders some discomfort. So my problem is that I tend to burst out laughing in the most inappropriate circumstances and seem to have no control over it. It might be at a friend's birthday treat, or when I notice two individuals walking or in the middle of class/postings or worse still, while discussing a serious matter with the Principal. A thorough in depth analysis of the reason behind this has brought me to the conclusion that I have a tendency to over-think. When the people around me heard the same sentences, they didn't find anything remotely amusing. But my confounded brain makes some connections that they couldn't imagine (nobody could believe that I would think in that angle) and hence I had a tough time stifling my laughter while the others looked at me in surprise. The other incident could also be attributed to the same cause. The brain processes a simple harmless data into something much more fancy and embellished that appears humorous and hence the intractable giggling in inappropriate situations. What remains now is now I somehow learn the art of keeping a straight face and avoid embarrassment. 

In case you want to know more:

• http://brainworldmagazine.com/neuroscience-of-comedy/ 
• http://www.nature.com/news/1998/981217/full/news981217-2.html

Another thing I discovered recently is the redundancy of Antidepressants. Depression is something many people will claim to have experienced but the few who have been clinically diagnosed with it would know that it is a quagmire of hopelessness that would drag you into its realm and before you know it you are incapable of getting out of the whirlpool of endless thoughts circulating within. From what I know, there are two theories (among others) that are proposed for the pathogenesis of depression.

• BDNF (Brain Derived Neurotropic Factor) is an important component that has an overall role in controlling emotions and thoughts. Any decrease in BDNF could trigger depression.
• Monoamine depletion. Seratonin, Dopamine and Noradrenaline are some of the neurotransmitters whose variation could also contribute to depression. Current antidepression therapy is aimed at mainaining the levels of these neurotransmitters at the optimum levels. Drugs include:
• MAO-B inhibitors: Moclobemide
• Amitryptilline, Nortryptilline, Imipramine, Desipramine, Doxepin, Dothiepin
• Fluoxetine and other SNRIs.
• I can't remember the newer Anti Depressants.
• NUTELLA. This single substance could alter the treatment of MDD radically if it were administered to all those suffering from disappointment, loss, desperation and hopelessness. As most people who have consumed this sinful delight would know by now, Nutella is fairly addictive and this ensures it has a regular fan base. A casual google search of the science of nutella addiction threw up some results that caution against it's use.( http://www.healthy-holistic-living.com/what-you-need-to-know-about-nutella.html?t=SOE )

My point? Eat Nutella, Live Happily Ever After! :D 

Songs are my refuge when the world shuts its doors or when I choose to shut my doors against the world. Playlist:

• American Oxygen (Rihanna)
• Bas Ek Pal (KK)
• Beetein Lamhein (KK)
• Naseeba (Sunidhi)
• Mine (Phoebe Ryan)
• Khwaishein (Arijit)

Toodles! :D

Novus Actus Interveniens

Currently dormant on the blogosphere for a variety of reasons:

• Paucity of time. (5th term is hectic. A certain Sir’s sudden surge in the subject has led to unexpected assignments cropping up out of nowhere and monopolizing the weekends. What began with a harmless blood donation day related poster presentation then led to making mind maps on assigned topics, giving seminars on clinical pathology topics, writing descriptions for museum specimens and now for the actual (official) assignments in our records! Oh, and I was speaking of only Pathology. 3 other subjects are also demanding to be studied.)

• No 3G in my new room. (I’ve shifted one floor above (that explains for the lack of exercise) and I can barely get 2G in my current location so blogging has suffered a setback.)

• Writer’s block. I haven’t been reading much these days. I’ve realized that in my current schedule, I can’t possibly read classics which require long stretches at a time which I’m not able to devote. All I can do is snatch a few minutes during classes, postings or prior to bed. I’m currently reading The Winner Stands Alone by Paulo Coelho (thanks to Anu :) ) and it seems to be interesting (prompted my previous post) although the style of writing could have been a few notches higher. 

But today I have decided to blog come what may! So we’re currently in 5th term and our exams are fast approaching (all the faculties take great pains to remind us at every possible instant about this alarming fact.) and we’re now in General Medicine postings after a month of General Surgery.

During these Surgery postings we saw a lot of ulcers (traumatic, diabetic ulcers in aged individuals, trophic ulcers, varicose (venous) ulcers, arterial ulcers and so on..) and swellings (in the neck region, in the inguinal region, lump in the breast, etc ). We also had to present cases (where once again I exhibited my unfailing talent of making a flop show (I must say, I’m getting good at this! -_-) and we had classes as well. Some were taught by the new surgeon Dr Nagaraj who’s joined Subbaiah after his stint in McGann and he seemed to give us some orientation from the examination point of view. Some others were taught by Aarthi maám (where once again I was distracted by that haircut), Gopinath Sir (who looks for opportunities to show us that he can he sarcastic) and of course, the HoD and Principal of the college who can be described as enthusiastic and passionate (to say the least. This is an online platform, after all) and he ensured that our lunch breaks were reduced to a 15 minute affair on numerous occasions. Nevertheless, I saw my first (and only) surgery (appendicectomy) performed by him during these postings. (an interesting, yet odd experience)

Another interesting update that I must mention is about Pathology. So in an earlier post I’d mentioned about the preliminary round of a Pathology quiz held in our class. As luck would have it, 10 of us were selected for the next round and a quiz was conducted for 5 teams of two participants. We weren’t really given much help regarding the quiz but we just told to read as we normally would and prepare for some embarrassment. As things unfolded, BP and I were a team while Abhi and Bharat were another. The formation of teams was a major confusion created quite a bit of pandemonium. In the weekend leading up to the quiz, the tension was palpable in the air and I was at my wit’s end given that there was also a CSF analysis to be presented on the same afternoon. BP and I spent a good part of the weekend reviewing people and topics of interest over the internet and that proved to be a boon to us the following day. The quiz was interesting we managed to open our account in the first round with a few guesses of the names of the scientists and other famous people. (Giemsa, Barbara McLintock, Papanicolou, Henrietta Lacks..) We faltered in the following rounds, partly due to our carelessness (Fat Embolism) and partly due to stupidity (Etiology) but we tried to cover up for it in the Rapid Fire. We came a close second with 80 points after Abhi and Bharat with 85, and this means that come 26th September, we will head to SDM Medical College, Dharwad for the Pathology Quiz. About the quiz, we need to study a LOTLOTLOT more than what we’re doing right now but Time is just not with us these days given that there is barely time to breathe in the midst of classes, postings, labs studies, records, assignments and yes, some time to unwind with friends..

As for the CSF analysis, we were a group of 5 and there was some or the contribution from 80% of us. 

(Not many people actually caught this bit. :P )

Technical Support:
Script: Karthik BV and Pawan
Videography: Harshit Krishna and Rajesh KH
Narrator: Jayashree Rao

I spoke about the indications for analyzing CerebroSpinal Fluid, the procedure and instruments used in Lumbar Puncture, the physical and biochemical analysis of CSF to differentiate between various etiologies of meningitis, CSF rhinorrhea and some other pointers that must be remembered while examining CSF (eg: one must analyze the sample within an hour of collection, one must not refrigerate the sample and so on.. ) Unfortunately for him, V Sir had to leave the middle of it but luckily for me it came an end without any major hiccup (or cough, literally speaking!)

Recently watched Phantom with friends and we followed this up with dinner at Anmol where we discussed the most controversial topics over the meal but it was an interesting evening on the whole. Off late, I haven’t been too choosy about the movies I’ve watched but we generally have a good time as we go as a group and have fun. Phantom made for a mildly interesting watch although it seems to be too fast paced with minimal room for interpersonal interaction. 

My current soundtrack includes:

• Gulabi (A slightly old song, from Shuddh Desi Romance but I’ve developed a fondness for it recently. The MTV unplugged version has a vibrant twinge to it so that’s better than the original in my opinion)
• Saware (by Arijit Singh, from Phantom)
• Chal Wahaan Jathe Hai (Arijit Singh)
• Tu Hi Re (an old song sung by Hariharan and Chitra)
• E Sanje and Dennana Dennana (Flute version) from the movie Rangitaranga

Often, I wonder how is it that some can let go and adapt so instantaneously while others take longer and some take forever. Is it all so ephemeral and fake? Is that what life really is about? Moving from one character to another from time to time? It comes down to this: There are some who attach much meaning to their relations with others, relationships, events, places and everything adds on to their memories. You could say they value every little thing in life, from a broken gift from a now distanced friend which they will refuse to throw away to every person whom they befriend /get acquainted with. And there are others who also have the same friendships, relations and so on, except that they do not attach meaning to everything in life. In such instances, it is easier to walk in and out of situations because there is a lot less baggage and bother. They are also less affected by changes, sudden shift of circumstances and any oscillations. Often, I wonder, which is the path to tread? In this fast paced world, it may seem appropriate to choose the second path because the first path is a classic case of thinking from the heart and not from the brain (although being a medical student, I must refrain from using such unscientific terms) and often only leads to disappointment. But the second one seems too mechanical and business-like to me. It might be the smarter decision but it may not be the one that makes me happy. It takes the innocence out of life if we can be so dissociated from what we feel and what we do. It might make me seem like a fool, but more often than not, I end up in the first case.

Coming to other matters of note, it appears that there will be no definitive changes in my boarding and lodging beginning in the near future. There has been a lot of confusion over this recently and I am mentally fatigued by thinking about the possible outcomes. I realized that I must be flexible to change, to adapt and evolve as the circumstances expect me to. I realize that happiness is every person’s birthright and I cannot covet that of another by my stubbornness. When you’re number is up, they’ll find you. I’m trying hard not to think too much or too far ahead or assume too much but just hope for the best and take it as it comes. It might seem irrational, unnecessary and daunting but it might bring the change that we are looking for. If I don’t believe that it will be possible, who else will?  Yet again, being reminded that there is an eerie resemblance to such events that occurred in the past, this whole concept appears daunting. There is a lot at stake and there is the fear of being left in the lurch but if I realize that I must let go of the cloud of negativity hovering above me and prepare to face the challenges as they come. After all, people take turns in a battle. One must enter the warzone when his compatriot is wounded.

It appears that I have blabbered endlessly and bored you all, yet I am filled with contentment. Nothing clears my head like a nice long blog post! :D

February Jitters.

Hello there, readers. I have been unfaithful and this shall hopefully not repeat. 

The sporting events at Subbaiah have (almost) come to a conclusion. We had two days at Nehru Stadium where the track events, badminton, basketball, football and kho-kho were held while cricket, throwball and volleyball for boys and girls were held on the campus itself.

In the week prior to the sporting events, the campus was abuzz with activity, an unprecedented number of students were up at the crack of dawn to practise for the upcoming matches and coaching sessions continued late into the night. Badminton left me weary and tired and the additional basketball practise sessions in the stadium after freezing in the auto-ride had me completely exhausted and fatigued. But the funniest thing is despite the sudden increase in physical activity, I had trouble falling asleep and several nights were spent tossing and turning or pondering over ways to better my game. You could say it was a mild obsession to change the outcome of the match compared to last year and nobody believed it more than myself.

D-day arrived and events unfolded in an unexpected manner. Newer, better players had surfaced and I realized that there are miles to go before I get there. Yes, it's never easy to take defeat but eventually you'll have to take it in your stride. I gave it all my effort, but surely, I could do better. Because it certainly seems hard to digest the fact that I've given my best and I can't do better than that. 

PPK, Jeslin and I. Baddie Day!

Be that as it may, moving on to basketball, the first match that we played was fairly decent and both teams played in the spirit of the game. We won thanks to Pragathi managing to score in the last quarter of the game. The final match turned out to be a pathetic flop show that looked so bad that it was actually hilarious. An absolute disaster though it was, the plus side is that we contributed 1 point to the Mavericks.

On both the days, after the sports session, I indulged in a hogging session either at Cafe Chillax or at Goli with a round of Golgappas (they seem to have become a part of my staple diet. I've had golgappas 5 times in the last 10 days!!) 

The very next day after all these sporting events was Cultural Day 1. Scheduled for the day were Drawing and Sketching, Mehendi, Pick and Speak, Debate and JAM. The turn out was a lot lesser compared to the previous year all thanks to the mass exodus of students to their hometowns assuming that these are "vacations". Nevertheless, the show had to go on and we had to conduct the show for the participants who turned up. Debate was well attended and there was considerable interaction from the audience. The topics were Euthanasia and Groupism in colleges. 

Day 2 began with Rangoli at the footsteps of the college and this was followed by Hairstyling, Face Painting, Quiz Prelims, Singing and Antakshari. The latter turned out to be a crowd-puller thanks to active participation from the faculty (RK Sir was in his element).

Day 3 was the much awaited saree day. Basically an extended photo session. :)

Group Pic :)

Quiz finals was interesting and made us think. But it also was a wake up call to brush up on my fading quizzing skills. We came a close second but the best part was the pic we managed to get with Vaibhav Sir. ;)

1. Company that manufactures the largest number of tires?
2. What does the wave form in the Cisco logo signify?
3. Connect: one bill of laundry, one half read novel, phone number of one girl, one important paper,the heart king from my playing cards, one ring of silver,one pocket and one denim jacket, two passes of a one day match, and brand new sunglasses.
4. Synonymous company of Sri Kalyanram Iyengar whose product is authorised to be sold solely by Vijaya Bank
5. The story of Aravinda Pillalamarri and Ravi Kuchimanchi, the NRI couple who returned to India and developed the pedal power generator to light remote, off-the-grid village schools inspired which movie?

• Happiness is when two minds think alike and one voices what the other wishes. 
• Joy is when old memories come back in the form of old friends walking back into your life.
• Awkwardness is when one fails to wriggle out of a situation and hence remains caged in the circumstance.
• Distance is felt when memories become a burden and you begin to forget the little things.
• Tolerance is when you don't care enough to be rude so being nice is but natural.

Currently "determined to be depressed". Reasons are plenty but the most prominent of them might have something to do with the upcoming calendar of events. XD 

Sometimes I wonder, what is the purpose of frivolity? I don't mean one must maintain a poker face and a grim outlook towards life. What is the purpose of temporary tomfoolery?But then again, everybody has their own mantra in life. For some it is "Live in the moment" or "Live for the moment", hence consequences of one's actions do not play a prominent role. Ultimately, I wish to have a balance between the two. Life for the moment but make those moments memorable for eternity. Patience is a virtue I have had until now. Sanjana's words will remain in my mind for a long time to come; the sweetness of a laddoo is best enjoyed when one waits until it has cooled down. Being hasty only results in a scalded tongue. :)

I've often prided myself upon the fact that my face seldom betrays my emotions but it has recently come to my knowledge from several unrelated sources that my face is an obvious mirror of the thoughts wreaking havoc in my mind. Now this is a deeply disturbing fact and it must be rectified at the earliest.

So glad that Pa finally found the time to watch PK! Here's hoping that he'll begin Sherlock very soon. Happiness is when you text your family after what seems like ages and actually "chat" with them.

Books are waiting to be opened and it's about time I pick up where I'd stopped. Time waits for none and opportunities favor those give their best. My peers in other colleges are considering research opportunities overseas and here I am with no headway with regards to career. 

• Listen to Grammy award winning "Winds of Samsara" by Ricky Kej on Youtube. A beautiful watch with melody to accompany.
• Read the book "Life is what you make it"  by Preethi Shenoy on Atthe's recommendation. A really good read which made a lot of sense. Hope to read more of such books in future. 
• 'Invictus' by William Ernest Henley is a beautiful and powerful poem.
    

Out of the night that covers me,

 Black as the Pit from pole to pole,   

 thank whatever gods may be   

  For my unconquerable soul.   

   

In the fell clutch of circumstance 

  I have not winced nor cried aloud.   

Under the bludgeonings of chance   

  My head is bloody, but unbowed.   

   

Beyond this place of wrath and tears   

  Looms but the Horror of the shade, 

And yet the menace of the years   

  Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.   

   

It matters not how strait the gate,   

  How charged with punishments the scroll,   

I am the master of my fate:

  I am the captain of my soul.

Abhii

Icabooo

Adii 

Seeya folks! Be back sooon! :)

Price To Pay.

Life works differently for different people. Everybody has their own equations in life. Everybody has different rules by which they lead their lives. To each person, to get to their destination, they must chalk out their own path.

Sometimes, Life decides to play with you. Sometimes, Life decides to test your endurance. Life decides to put you through the obstacles that once made you stumble and fall just to see if you can rise up again, just to see if you can handle it, just to see if it can break down your dreams, goals and ambitions.

Each time you go into battle thinking that this will be the last time, telling yourself that there will only be good times ahead after this, convincing yourself that a wonderful life lies ahead but you are utterly mistaken.

Some things will always be a part of my life, I might as well get used to it. I guess I should never ever fall into the false sense of security that life will be okay. It only makes life harder to bear when bad times rear its ugly head at you.

Perhaps I am at fault for believing that things are okay, perhaps there is a price to pay for having fun, having a good time and for daring to dream about good times.

They say that there is a rainbow at the end of rain but I've realized that in my life, there can only be phases of balmy sunshine in between the persistent storm.

What hurts is the fact that you'll have to go into battle alone. What hurts is the fact that your intentions are doubted, your integrity is questioned and nothing you say will ever make sense.

Here's praying for better times ahead. The last thing I can handle is the horrors of the past resurfacing.

Back To December #2

Is this the post where I go on about how this year has been phenomenal, how this year has been a roller coaster ride, how there have been ups and downs, how I've learnt new things, made new friends, had new experiences and evolved as a person? No. Because that would be too cliche' and I wouldn't want to bore you with details of every mundane event in my life, especially after blogging about it extensively.

Basically, I crib about how nothing ever works out the way I want it but eventually I realize that it's in fact a blessing in disguise. Deemed to be Desired by the Deserving.

Currently on a mission to fall in love- (Watched PK recently. {Oh, I like that song! "I want to waste my time"}) -With Robbins (I don't like the way you think, idiots.) [Icabo has sufficiently inspired and instructed me to read Robbins] and slowly I'm beginning to agree with her; he (Robbins) has a subtle humour and you can't help but start liking the book.](Confession: Tissue repair didn't seem as fascinating as it should have due to deprivation of caffeine.)

Recently remembered the existence of a subject by name Forensic Medicine and Toxicology. Hence, need to attend to this too apart from Pharmacology {a name game with 100000000001 drug names that seem so simple and clear but 3 units later Amilodarone (anti-arrhythmic drug) and Amiloride (K+ sparing diuretic) sound too similar for your comfort, Metolazone (thiazide like diuretic) and Chlormezanone (skeletal muscle relaxant) make you wonder if you actually know what's going on} and Microbiology {where we're reading up about several cute bacteria [Cute but Killer. Clostridium tetani is this seemingly innocent looking bacilli that can cause deadly gas gangrene, food poisoning, enteric collitis and something else I can't remember right now.] since they're done with Immunology}

I've never truly appreciated the beauty and potential of Sanskrit. I regularly listen to a few prayers that I find effective in instilling me with confidence but recently chanced upon a few more tracks that made me feel that there is some power released, some cosmic energy that is generated that soothes my nerves, calms my frayed brains and tries to direct me towards a state of equilibrium. 

The hum of Sanskrit shabdas (Ramah Ramau Ramaaha....) seemed like a monotonous drone in the beginning of Sanskrit class in high school. But when I decided to entertain Divya (who was then about 3-4 months old) with the same chant, it transformed into a lilting lullaby and brought about a serenity in minutes in an otherwise bawling baby (conditions apply: not always!)

Do I see Gimpi in Icabo or Icabo in Gimpi? 

Hasta La Vista. :)

Let It Go.

There's so much I'll have to blog about but there's no way I can do it. I'll have to do it in installments or just present the highlights (In bullet points, my eternal favourite.)

So here's what's happened since my last post:

• Bhopiee called me. (The very same day I posted my last blogpost which was a tad depressed to say the least.) It made me immensely happy and I love how she totally understood my predicament and offered some genuine advice to stay sane inspite of all the turmoil.
• Maidha called me. (After reading my previous post. It is noteworthy and ought to be mentioned because Sheepie calling up is a rarity that must be applauded. :P )
• We've had two Microbiology tests and a Pharmacology test.
• We attended a wedding in Shimoga and hogged on some banana leaf dinner after what seemed like forever. Yet another spontaneous event, we got all dressed up, blessed the couple and had some good food and returned fashionably late to the hostel.

  

  All set to attend the wedding :)

  

  Selfie in the Wedding.

• We celebrated Kannada Rajyothsava in college (where Pranesh, a humorous Kannada speaker and the Dollu Kunitha troupe provided entertainment.) So the entire event was Kannada themed and some of the performances were really good. 

Naada Geethe singing in progress.

• Random things tend to be a lot of fun, as I've discovered lately. DO NOT LAUGH. -_-

Sliding down the stairs on a mattress. :P

• I got into trouble with the Patho HoD in his class (inspite of showing him that I'd made notes of what he'd been teaching and he has decided to commit my face to his memory so that I get to make a fool of myself repeatedly. I'm just hoping that he won't remember me in his class in the coming week.
• Surgery postings are over and now we're having General Medicine postings. The initial few classes were taken by Dr. Mahendrappa who is from SIMS Govt. college. His classes are like a treasure trove of knowledge thanks to his immense experience at the reputed government hospital in the city. Several diseases are endemic to certain regions such as Kyasanur Forest disease which is prevalent in this region of fluorosis which is more common in Mundargi or Leprosy which is of higher incidence in Mysore. The way in which he describes anecdotes and cases that he has seen during his service in SIMS makes me wish I was also a part of such a 'real' medical college, brimming with patients, where you acquire soft skills and your experiences are more vast. (My desire to see McGann was partly fuelled by his classes). Apart from him there's also Dr.Shekharappa from SIMS who is also extremely good and doesn't divert much from the topic assigned (which is something I don't mind though. :P )
• Vaibhav Sir has been giving pearls of wisdom (laced and decorated with exceeding wit and sarcasm). It's amazing how some people are so knowledgeable about everything under the sun! It's not just about the field of study you are engaged in but also about everything else. His words are most often caustic yet we (OK, FINE, Maybe just Abhi and I) end up grinning like idiots over every statement that's even remotely witty). The making of a doctor is a long, arduous one and that requires sacrifices, tremendous will power and dedication. Somewhere, I guess we're nowhere near that. There's still miles and miles to go before we're even close to getting on the path towards being that person. To be "Somebody" in the medical field is not an overnight phenomenon. It happens after several years of patience, perseverance and practice. It's something that can be lost overnight, though.
• I've been eating out lately and hogging to gargantuan extents. Morning jogging and baddie sessions have temporarily ceased and must be resumed at the earliest. Hogged twice this week. Tuesday was at Cafe Chillax, Thursday with Adi at Mathura Central and Saturday again at CC.
• Amazon delivered to Shimoga. :) 

1. Ganong's Review of Medical Physiology
2. Basic and Clinical Pharmacology by Katzung
3. Phantoms in the Brain by VS Ramachandran
4. Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell

• And today, We'd been to Gajanur Dam and Sakrebailuru on gaadis. (Separate post about this up next! :D )
• Will finally be heading home next week (after nearly 6 weeks. The longest I've stayed on this campus) but it'll be for just a few days. Cannot WAIT to see MaPaDi and play with my hyper Bheemi.
• Oh yes. How could I forget? I'm possibly the BIGGEST Loser in the world. -_- I just don't get it! I have the horrrible, terrible, annoying, frustrating and depressing habit (Oh yes, this was the third time. :( ) of losing money. It just disappears randomly and no amount of searching, scavenging and excavation yields any positive result. I mourned over my loss for a day, carried out a massive search program in my room and the room I frequent most (Hula's room) and yet there was no hope. The worst part is there is no answer to what happened to it. :/
• 2014 is in its last leg and it actually seems like yesterday that I'd slept off on New Year's Eve after an evening out with MaPaDiMe, Atthe, Mama, Nidhi, Ajji, Poornima Aunty and family at Pai Viceroy.. So much has happened in this year. So many events, so many memories, so many experiences, so much to learn from... 

Oh yes, I could blog further about many more things that have been happening in my not so ordinary life but then Sundays are so rare they can't just be spent on the laptop. 

Off to Camp Laibu! :D